Re: The Beauty of His Last Night Wasted by OneFingerAnswer |
5-Feb-03/12:28 PM |
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regarding some deleted poem... |
5-Feb-03/12:33 PM |
Yes, as with the others I love this...the repetition of 'This night' made it feel to me as though it were being sung. I saw one of your other recent poems before I logged in which had rhyme, I've not seen your rhyming skills before, I'd better check it out.
Another nine for you, ma'am.
By the way, would it be impertinant of me to ask you to check out my latest works and tell me what you think? Especially the latest one. No-one's really told me if it's any good or not. Ta.
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Re: Grampa's Proverb by OneFingerAnswer |
5-Feb-03/12:34 PM |
Nice proverb aside from the syllables.
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Re: immaculate perception by w~* ATHENA *~w |
5-Feb-03/12:40 PM |
Do you listen to Black Sabbath, Athena?
"In the daylight/runs darkness/on the verge of night a fear is born/sweeter than the dream" etc. Good song
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Re: Mississipi Murder by scitz |
5-Feb-03/12:43 PM |
Nice.
A children's scream should be either a child's scream or children's scream...other than that, yeah.
8
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Re: Star Bright by x311 |
5-Feb-03/12:45 PM |
I quite like this...it's not so depressing, but yeah, it's cool. I don't think that you'll get a good vote from poetandknowit, somehow.
8
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Re: Of Bobjims (An actual poem this time!?!) by Bobjim |
10-Feb-03/12:42 PM |
Ahhhh, that inventiveness all the way from -
I wish you the best of luck in the future-my wish is the only hope you've got!
Ahahahahaha. Quite.
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Re: Instructions to a Sculptor by Christof |
10-Feb-03/12:49 PM |
Mr. Christof, this is one of the finest works of poetry that I've ever seen...you, sir, are a genius. May I ask as to whose poems you draw inspiration from? This is the template for the poems that I would love to write but don't have the ability-pleeeease let me know how you learnt to write like this! 10
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Re: The Errant Knight by Thyme |
13-Feb-03/12:46 PM |
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Re: Whales by Jeremi B. Handrinos |
15-Feb-03/4:49 PM |
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Re: Cupid promised me, Nadine by Shardik |
15-Feb-03/5:03 PM |
There are some brilliant images in here, not all of them go together, but sod it, who cares? Good stuff. 9
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Re: Parting the Curtains by Blue Magpie |
16-Feb-03/12:12 AM |
I like the poem-although perhaps you could try to structure it 4,3,2,1-put a line in after "Loneliness..." and have "And I..." on its own at the end.
Or maybe not. Nice poem anyway
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Re: Mebi by ==Doylum |
16-Feb-03/12:18 AM |
So descriptive! Hee hee hee...9 for laughter...and because there's not a nine yet.
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Re: Prelude to a Legend by ThoughtfulSoul |
16-Feb-03/12:34 AM |
There are some great lines in here, but too much unnecessary description of feeling (as god'swife says). I can see that you'll make a good writer or poet if you try. This deserves a 7, ideas and images are there, they just need to be selected and emphasised more (yeah, I know, emotion's a bastard to get down onto paper, I can't do it very well. Actually I can't write poetry very well. Oh well.)
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Re: Gloria's Falling Sun by OneFingerAnswer |
16-Feb-03/6:56 AM |
Neat work, and you've got possibly the best username on this site!
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regarding some deleted poem... |
16-Feb-03/7:13 AM |
God might be dead, but so is Neitzsche. Hell yeah.
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Re: Sharks For Libido by scitz |
16-Feb-03/7:15 AM |
Too long to be a haiku but the images are good.
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Re: The Gentleman by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. |
17-Feb-03/12:05 PM |
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Re: the midget of humiliation by Bill Z Bub |
17-Feb-03/12:10 PM |
I like the edit except for st. 6. I gave you a ten last time and stanza 3 more than equals that.
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Re: she said by Bill Z Bub |
17-Feb-03/12:12 PM |
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