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Gloria's Falling Sun (Other) by OneFingerAnswer
The color of sunset, pouring down over her eye She looks at him, pupils asking why The bruises forming already, like a darkening sky She looks away, heavy breath covering her sigh Apologies are to come like the light of a star, Meaning nothing of logic yet so romatic from afar She'll think it over again in some rundown bar, They'll all whisper when she gets back into his car Instant replay of the night before, deja vue She'll cower in a corner, it's all she can do, Perfectly block the combo, she's knows the one-two; The third will catch her jaw, that part is all new Laid out cold, pale yet shadowed like the moon Waking, she'll claim she's leaving, she'll sing the old tune Reflectioned light of your words, while fighting the swoon Parry the sword of Damocles for long and it will thrust too soon The darkness of night denied at the coming of the sun During the day and in the light he's so much fun Despite his nasty Hyde, his Jekyll is a convincing one Dawn following dusk until his starless night has finally won

Up the ladder: It's Over
Down the ladder: Landmine

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.428571
Weighted score: 5.384202
Overall Rank: 3225
Posted: February 16, 2003 4:03 AM PST; Last modified: February 16, 2003 4:03 AM PST
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Comments:
[8] Ranger @ 62.7.128.24 | 16-Feb-03/6:56 AM | Reply
Neat work, and you've got possibly the best username on this site!
[6] Zoe @ 172.214.160.179 | 6-Dec-05/5:55 AM | Reply
I like this, but I'm not sure about the nursery rhyme sing song quality of the rhyme - maybe blank verse would be a better restraint? Also I don't like the way that our heroine is left in the dark at the end. Couldn't she hit Hyde over the head with a saucepan and escape or something?
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