Re: The Abyss of myself by ciantu |
26-Nov-02/5:57 AM |
I've been saying this shit for years.
Every now and then i read something on this site and it restores my faith in the human condition, you sir are ahead of your time with this poem, stanza 2 is right their kicking like a mule. *9*
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Re: What's the Point of Love? by loneshadow29 |
26-Nov-02/5:46 AM |
The point of love is the 'falling' as it grounds you.
Love is A heroic loser seeded within the pounding pastures of our crimson core.
(at least you got me inspired)
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Re: Another Chance by Bonehiss |
26-Nov-02/5:40 AM |
I always find it difficult to rate your work as your obviously a hopeless romantic, who writes unchallenging, simple writings. I'm giving you a 6 on this because their is a purity to your work. However I have to criticize you on one aspect and that is the lack of originality in your work, it is a very basic 'greeting card' style with little fibre and alluring qualities.
Fair play to you though, none of us here are Hemingway at the moment, just lose yourself more in your imagination and you'll find more satisfaction in your creativity.
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Re: Maria's ways on how to deal with puberty! by little_angel_maria |
26-Nov-02/5:20 AM |
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Re: Maliced flame by T'ien |
26-Nov-02/4:31 AM |
Not a bad 'ad break' read *6*
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Re: Cocky by Goose |
26-Nov-02/3:55 AM |
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Re: Liar by Goose |
26-Nov-02/3:54 AM |
This would be better as a Haiku, as it stands its still good but I would be interested to see how much more you could say with less.
Hope I haven't cooked your goose, Mr Goose -7-
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Re: Johannesburg 2002 by Blue Magpie |
26-Nov-02/3:52 AM |
So they pissed you off huh?
This IS a confounding and impressive piece, well done -8-
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Re: "My Love" by wickedemon4 |
26-Nov-02/3:48 AM |
I wrote something like this once for my girlfriend.
She finished with me and looking back who could blame her?
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Re: Small Town Snow by OneFingerAnswer |
25-Nov-02/1:42 AM |
Some of this was like a drive through Twin Peaks.
A Damn fine cherry pie ma'm -7-
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Re: Wave to the starving children Miss Denmark. by horus8 |
25-Nov-02/1:38 AM |
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Re: Are We Losing Those Things We Hold Dear by abbaslittleclingon |
25-Nov-02/1:17 AM |
You could have carried this on to hit home your message harder. however I liked it, some nice phrases a.l.c
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Re: My world Of Emptiness by abbaslittleclingon |
25-Nov-02/1:15 AM |
not bad, 1st line definitely doesnt sound right, check the grammar ok?
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Re: The Smurf Village by Bachus |
23-Nov-02/2:02 AM |
This is the important one, the sinister paradise of the smurfs, its about to kick off - bigtime in smurfopia
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Re: Beginning or End? by xdarkxangelx24 |
22-Nov-02/9:06 AM |
I think its the end !
For your keyboard that is, for Xmas I will buy you an enter button
and a spring
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Re: The Advent Of Monsoon by anitawit |
22-Nov-02/9:02 AM |
This is really good but its very similar to 'Come Nightime' I think you should remove one and enter one of them later, different beasts with the same growl.
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Re: Come Night time by anitawit |
22-Nov-02/8:59 AM |
You seem to have been inspired and it shows, I was wondering if the little pinpoints of light were the eyes of a dormouse about to be slaughtered in the matrix?
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Re: A load of bollocks - literally!!! by Yardbird |
22-Nov-02/8:33 AM |
at least it wasn't a sock
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Re: Dying for a Dowry by Blue Magpie |
22-Nov-02/8:05 AM |
A powerful statement indeed, its well written and you need to name more specifically those responsible for this atrocity,(e.g the government, the husbands, local authorities, the u.n.) because the subject is sensitive and to some an outsider viewing the insider may provoke racial accusations.
I think however you've researched the facts, the last line could be more affecting, maybe 'Vishnu's Infasdel' would go better for the last line.
Bottom line I liked it, (7)
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Re: Dreaming by TripleHGurl |
22-Nov-02/6:36 AM |
I've been through the clouds too.
thanks to jack daniels
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