Re: a comment on Child of Troy by Caducus	27-May-04/2:06 PM
Amendments made you're right. The end however I have to disagree and think it says everything I wanted to convey. Good to see you still on here. Oh and i was a part of the childs brief history, before she prematurely ages by following her mothers lifestyle
Re: Truckers should not be poets by INTRANSIT	17-May-04/10:59 AM
a welcome epilogue of mr intransit, cool - likey !
Re: Diary entry (edit) by richa	14-Apr-04/5:51 AM
Agree with horus, the 1st stanza is quite expuisite in the way it is written. You are a fine talent richard.
Re: a comment on Somewhere In Islam by Caducus	13-Apr-04/3:20 PM
Thanks for the corrections and timeout.
Re: AIDS in a van by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.	12-Apr-04/11:42 AM
real moving man.
Re: EGG by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?	12-Apr-04/11:41 AM
True to the title
Re: a comment on Swan Lake by Caducus	8-Apr-04/3:11 PM
Throwing pebbles in to the water whenyour melancholy.
Re: a comment on Bread Wine And Chocolate by Caducus	1-Apr-04/9:58 AM
you got it - thanks for reading it
Re: A Flower for Monet by Shuushin	30-Mar-04/5:15 AM
perfect end too
Re: A Flower for Monet by Shuushin	30-Mar-04/5:15 AM
Hat tipped - great wordplay.
Re: The Punk With The Stutter by Joe-joe	30-Mar-04/5:14 AM
I lost my father recently at kensington, was he wearing a green wax jacket?
Re: Lullaby by Goad	25-Jan-04/3:11 AM
Liked the way you vividly illustrate a poem. The part about the pigs ear was excellent. This to me came alive and kicking from S2. The opening 3 lines didn't grab me and I'm barren as to why. The ending lingered in my thoughts and a very well crafted poem - but hey what the hell do i know? 9
Re: a comment on A Kiss Beneath The Blossom Tree by Caducus	25-Jan-04/2:52 AM
I agree with all your suggestions and will try and deal with each one in the right mood and tone for the type of poem. The grammatical errors i should have noticed. What I tried to evoke in the point about the limp and loving words was his limp was from abuse but the loving words passed on to his son was his resolute determination in not being like HIS Father. He limped physically but never emotionally. 'Solace would be found in the hills' maybe I could say something like 'Solace could be found in the sheperding hills' (but more brief), Mother instead of Mum Iused Mum as its more earthly. I thought about trying to add a line in to why my Mum was in the hills that day but couldn't integrate anything in to a line. Thank you for your points as it is obvious to me that you have picked up on relevant weaknesses and i'll try and sort it.
Re: Once the moon turned me into a hairy vagina by horus8	24-Jan-04/3:51 PM
Sounds like the lost page of genesis. The 1st line grabs and so the 8th
Re: To those that would teach poetry by INTRANSIT	24-Jan-04/3:48 PM
Love the notions of being who we ARE and not what others want us to be. A real archers bowfinger to conformity.
Re: Anvil man by INTRANSIT	31-Dec-03/6:09 AM
Excellent title. This could have been quite tedious but your a wordsmith meister and i have to say mr intransit....this is one of your best. (in my op) 10 deserves hits.
Re: Chaos & his dreamchild (genesis) --Revised Edition-- by SupremeDreamer	31-Dec-03/6:07 AM
Liked it, one reason i did was because it has at least 2 parts it can be ended with an impact. Loved the 1st 3 big time.
Re: The wise by richa	31-Dec-03/6:01 AM
of a half-formed thought, just the uneven lines of every faked smile. This made me feel how aging is a complete waste of time if this is the case. Classy.
Re: She is A Lover Deep Within by Joe-joe	12-Dec-03/2:12 PM
For your young years you are a fine writer. I am mr pig too joe joe.
Re: The Glint by peaceseeker	12-Dec-03/2:10 PM
Though I dislike your attitude I must say a 4 is unfair. I actually think this shows a side to of you I like and the word play is good. TAstes like diamonds I don't get? ________8________