DetailsThe poem, its numbers, and the conversation.

Free verse № 95368

A Flower for Monet

by Shuushin

Member since 2003 · Posted 29 Mar 2004 · Edited 29 Mar 2004 · 43 comments

From the deck of the Eiffel Tower, petite mademoiselle Michelle chooses a flower - sweet alyssum, to parachute upon the wind.  Through the white-washed avenues, past open doorways and windows, above the cobblestone streets of Argenteuil she watches it sail, never in a straight line, as the orange sun rises above the Seine.  Her gift floats through time and past memories of Bazille, then Renoir, weaving past Pissarro, and Boudin - to land at the feet of Monet. _____________________________________

Rate it

0 is the worst, 10 the best. Pick a number, add a comment if you like, then send it. Keys: 0–9 pick, Enter sends.

mean 4.01 weighted 4.01 rank 13356 views 1179 View voting details →

137 votes so far. Yours would make 138.137 votes so far

A favorite of francis nor capule, moonlightdance, TearsOnRoses, Stacy Stewart, dancin_n_da_moonlite, Niphredil, half.italian, sca.

43 comments

[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 30-Mar-04/4:17 AM Reply
A profoundly leaky guff in its own grease.
[10] Caducus 30-Mar-04/5:15 AM Reply
Hat tipped - great wordplay.
[10] Caducus 30-Mar-04/5:15 AM Reply
perfect end too
[9] richa 30-Mar-04/6:42 AM Reply
Very well put together.
[10] francis nor capule 30-Mar-04/7:58 AM Reply
very moving
[9] Dan garcia-Black 30-Mar-04/10:32 AM Reply
Impressive.
[9] deleted user 30-Mar-04/10:33 AM Reply
Sentimentally moving. But why Monet?
[9] sca › deleted user 9-Jun-07/12:13 AM Reply
the waterlillies?
[9] sca › sca 9-Jun-07/12:14 AM Reply
although correctly, not neccessarily the same flower, probably more to do with his capture of light (aka moments)
[n/a] FreeFormFixation 30-Mar-04/10:48 AM Reply
very IMPRESSIONable
[n/a] Shuushin 30-Mar-04/10:53 AM Reply
HEY guys, THANKS. Been in training most of the day and I popped out to check messages - horry cow.

Thanks for the good words - much appreciated!!
[10] aliena 2-Apr-04/12:08 AM Reply
Excellent, excellent!!! take a 10 for this poem about my favourite impressionist
[10] zodiac › aliena 2-Apr-04/4:06 AM Reply
Of course he is.
[10] Doc › zodiac 6-Apr-04/9:29 AM Reply
Of course you would say that.
[10] zodiac › Doc 6-Apr-04/9:32 AM Reply
Of course -- no, wait. Bow'ls.

Would you care to expl -- sorry again. Bow'ls.
[10] zodiac › zodiac 6-Apr-04/9:40 AM Reply
I refer the matter to my latest post, "My Favorite Baseball Team, The Yankees":

http://www.poemranker.com/poem-details.jsp?id=96112
[10] Doc › zodiac 6-Apr-04/9:55 AM Reply
Of couse it is.
[10] zodiac › Doc 6-Apr-04/10:04 AM Reply
Exactly. And if you're a doctor, I'm an amateur surprise prostate-examiner.
[10] tadpole 25-Apr-04/9:23 PM Reply
nice visuals
[10] terbenaw 1-May-04/3:01 PM Reply
Beautiful wordplay... well thought out... beautiful overall.
[10] INTRANSIT 9-Jun-04/7:27 AM Reply
I hate it when I miss really good stuff like this.
[9] arduinn 11-Jun-04/9:24 AM Reply
smooth
[10] sliver 17-Jun-04/4:18 PM Reply
Yes Yes, cudos. Very well done
[10] Brittanyy 18-Jun-04/11:41 PM Reply
This is one of the few poems that I think actually deserves to be in the top 20. Wait, does that make sense? Oh well..Great job!
[9] TearsOnRoses 10-Aug-04/11:07 PM Reply
very beautiful poem
[n/a] Shuushin › TearsOnRoses 11-Aug-04/5:04 AM Reply
Glad you enjoyed it.
[8] Christof 3-Sep-04/8:21 AM Reply
Despite a certain fey quality, very good.
[8] Bhaskaryya 21-Dec-04/7:57 AM Reply
Love the weave of words. Check me out if you could!!
[10] dancin_n_da_moonlite 13-Jan-05/8:35 PM Reply
this is by far the best poem i have read in avery long time .........i love it ............is is so beautiful.............:)
[n/a] Shuushin › dancin_n_da_moonlite 13-Jan-05/9:23 PM Reply
Thanks ddm - may I ask how you happened to look at it?
[10] dancin_n_da_moonlite › Shuushin 14-Jan-05/3:06 PM Reply
i had just posted a poem---and i felt like reading some others-------so i went to the list of people who were currently using the site-------and u were the first one listed--------then i just read one of ur poems-------

-mega
[10] dancin_n_da_moonlite › dancin_n_da_moonlite 16-Jan-05/9:56 PM Reply
i know i have already posted about ur poem but i was just rereading it and i have to tell you that i really do love it is one of the best poems i have read in a very long time.........it is so well written
-mega
[n/a] Shuushin › dancin_n_da_moonlite 16-Jan-05/10:39 PM Reply
a golden oldie, thanks!
[n/a] Stephen Robins 9-Feb-05/8:02 AM Reply
Shite.
[7] James Rykelangeli 27-Feb-05/3:42 PM Reply
nothing to object to concerning the technique: the words read smoothly, and the dropping flower cleverly solidifies the structure. its excessive sentimentality, however, weakens its potential cuteness and whimsicality. as for reducing the sentimentality, i'd excise the superfluous sunrise and rewrite "Her gift floats through time/ and past memories," as it's currently trite but has considerable poetic potential. still, i'm only dwelling on the poem's few shortcomings. overall, impressive and expressive. well done.
[10] Quarton 25-May-05/4:06 PM Reply
Quite simply elegant and I don't impress easily. The
best I have read at this site.
[n/a] Shuushin › Quarton 26-May-05/6:55 AM Reply
Thank you Quarton, high praise. Much appreciated.
[8] lmp 30-Dec-05/1:30 PM Reply
delicately poised visuals. i can see the blossom's course, yet i do wonder why it ever lands... well done.
[4] Edna Sweetlove 16-Jan-07/12:01 PM Reply
Much better than usual. Almost interesting in fact. Still lacking in humour though.
[n/a] Shuushin › Edna Sweetlove 16-Jan-07/1:11 PM Reply
You could have just said you were jealous, and be done with it.
[9] sca 9-Jun-07/12:15 AM Reply
Very, very nice. This tipped off my tongue beautifully, and the language/wording is excellent. It's classy in the beautiful sense.
[8] Christof 27-Jun-07/6:29 AM Reply
I commented before but never voted - here you go. I think end slightly lets it down, too limpid, too unearned, but the piece reads beautifully. Is the 'orange sun' over the Seine in the second stanza a reference to a Monet painting - is that the connection?
[n/a] Shuushin › Christof 29-Jun-07/6:02 AM Reply
yes and also; the orange sun is a reference to "Impression: sunrise" (and others using a similar technique) while it is also a nod to the rising influence of being able (through talent and advances in materials) to acheive the groundbreaking results he (and other impressionists) did. It's a, ah - "poetic device".