Re: Shades by Niphredil	Ranger 62.252.32.15	18-Mar-06/2:31 PM
For the context, I thought the first line was stunning. Good parallels between living and dead. I felt like I wanted an image after line two - something in keeping with the 'barren timbers'/'rotten floorboards' theme perhaps. Other than that, no quarrel.
Re: I sat beside the night by Niphredil	Ranger 62.252.32.15	18-Mar-06/2:36 PM
Great metre! Very classical in feel, meets with approval here. I like the idea of the night kissing someone's upturned face - some nicely original ideas in this one.
Re: Forgiveness by Niphredil	Ranger 62.252.32.15	18-Mar-06/2:41 PM
This is great! The sort of anti-Pimple...I like the alternative viewpoint - unexpected, certainly.
Re: I don't rhyme enough, eh? by Niphredil	Ranger 62.252.32.15	18-Mar-06/2:47 PM
"I'm sure that a poem is oft viewed as neater/When properly rhymed and according to meter"...this made me chuckle! And yes...rhyming isn't the easiest thing in the world, well, good rhyming, that is.
Re: Waking at night by Niphredil	Ranger 62.252.32.15	18-Mar-06/2:50 PM
Hmm...wasn't sure about 'bat-wings beat spastically' - it seemed a bit cumbersome, and bats are generally very graceful, in an odd sort of way - the same way that swifts are.
Re: Returning Home by Niphredil	Ranger 62.252.32.15	18-Mar-06/2:55 PM
Reminds me of Christmas Eve when I was about eleven...a beautiful night, one that felt more enchanted than usual...one of my favourite memories...that's put a smile on my face =D so for that, thank you
Re: The Peccadillary by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.	some deleted user 88.153.190.208	18-Mar-06/4:13 PM
I'd just like to say, I grew up on your poemes.
Re: Louwanda by Jeremi B. Handrinos	Silverjackel 65.138.142.121	18-Mar-06/7:43 PM
I like it
Re: The Ocean by Fayt	Silverjackel 65.138.142.121	18-Mar-06/7:57 PM
The only problem I have with it is it is an incomplete sentence, "bringing" being in the present tense form. You might try: Gentle ocean waves, Always moving with the wind Breathe a life to all But I'm not trying to write it for you. In fact, I don't really like what I wrote either X(
regarding some deleted poem...	Silverjackel 65.138.142.121	18-Mar-06/8:30 PM
Your Haikus aren't THAT bad for your's to be the worst three on the site, in my opinion. I give it a 6.
Re: The Poop Machines by dougsoderstrom	Silverjackel 65.138.142.121	18-Mar-06/8:36 PM
I would have given this a 4, but after reading 9/11, I would give it an 11. Exquisite literature.
Re: Louwanda by Jeremi B. Handrinos	wilco 24.92.74.122	19-Mar-06/1:11 AM
babies havin' babies..
Re: Mid-July by Ranger	wilco 24.92.74.122	19-Mar-06/1:20 AM
I likes..you shall have a 9.
Re: Looking Back by x0lovelylarnx0	wilco 24.92.74.122	19-Mar-06/1:25 AM
Some good sentiments, but just not a very...ummm..daring? poem..just not too inventive...could be worked on and turned into something though.
Re: Indiscrete by ecargo	wilco 24.92.74.122	19-Mar-06/1:33 AM
super
Re: Martijn by Chasz Misleading	wilco 24.92.74.122	19-Mar-06/1:36 AM
I think you misspelled Martin's name. Seriously, though folks. I think if you want to poast this for others to read, maybe shorten it and make it a little more interesting. Otherwise just give it to Martijn.
Re: Judged by Dovina	wilco 24.92.74.122	19-Mar-06/1:40 AM
Hey, I'm back. Excited?
Re: Louwanda by Jeremi B. Handrinos	Ranger 62.252.32.15	19-Mar-06/3:40 AM
Loving the title - it suits the poem perfectly (and it is, by the way, a top poem!) Good to see you back!
Re: My Resuscitating Love by Silverjackel	Ranger 62.252.32.15	19-Mar-06/3:43 AM
Interesting concept, and very linguistically impressive. 'Miracle/Satirical' is one of the more innovative rhymes in recent posts!
Re: The Cracks in my Wall by Richard	Ranger 62.252.32.15	19-Mar-06/3:48 AM
Ugh, I don't like this kid, but I do like the poem. Particularly the spice in the sunset, very vividly done. A couple of suggestions - there are a few typos in here, 'viciousness', 'was' (line 15), 'neighbo(u)r's'. Also, I would have added one more violent-themed activity just to complete the distasteful character. I love 'Today there was no change...I was just supposed to be evil'.