| Re: What you know by INTRANSIT |
23-Aug-03/11:52 AM |
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| Re: A Poet's Rifle by SupremeDreamer |
23-Aug-03/11:47 AM |
must you always begin your poems this way?
it's arresting
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| Re: a comment on Camera Obscura by Fear of Garbage |
21-Aug-03/8:00 PM |
why does everyone think that I am a guy?
Clearly I am not.
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| Re: A Surgeons Butchery by SupremeDreamer |
21-Aug-03/7:03 PM |
i felt like i was reading a story when i read this, i'm not sure if that's good or bad.
not big on the way it begins. it seems too jumpy and not in the good way.
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| Re: Clay Man by eliastemplar |
1-Aug-03/7:24 PM |
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| Re: and love, an envy by richa |
20-Jun-03/3:28 PM |
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| Re: I'll Just Have a Salad by jessicazee |
20-Jun-03/3:19 PM |
you know you're in trouble when a decent poem contains the word "yam" in it, not meant as a vegetable.
sufficient.
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| Re: The Truth of Death by Schizophrenic |
6-Jun-03/3:50 PM |
what is the point of this poem?? the truth of death is that she lived slightly before she dies?
i see no purpose in this....degradation of poetry.
also, "ultra-sharp" does not do it for me as an, ahem, adjective.
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| Re: Break Dancing Charlie by <{Baba^Yaga}> |
3-Jun-03/8:55 PM |
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the last satnza is my favourite. as it should be.
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| Re: "Your shrimp cocktail", wide ass. by Bachus |
3-Jun-03/8:52 PM |
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meh. myabe it's because i don't really like haikus much
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| Re: Plucking hearts and banjo by horus8 |
1-Jun-03/4:34 PM |
therefore you own up to nothing?
yeah, i bet you don't.
how chillingly creepy.
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| Re: There is no Happy Hour in Bakersfield, Ca. by horus8 |
31-May-03/6:44 PM |
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not one of my favourites of yours, but it got better towards the end. still better than 7/8 of anything put up on this site.
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| Re: Lonely Soul by sir_heff |
30-May-03/1:04 PM |
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why are you daring me to call you a fake
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| Re: Pine by andrewjthomas |
29-Apr-03/5:43 PM |
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this has a lot of potential but i expected much more from the last stanza
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| Re: Dumbfounded, dumbfucked by Bane |
26-Apr-03/1:49 PM |
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you've got potential. keep going
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| Re: Scarlet Bridge by marvelis |
26-Apr-03/1:44 PM |
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wow. it souds like you're just doing this for the hell of a rhyme. a very bad rhyme.
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| Re: Beauty, sleeping (revised) by Ranger |
26-Apr-03/1:42 PM |
i like the first two lines and the last
sort of ironic
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| Re: A Piano With No Keys by Quarton |
6-Apr-03/4:50 PM |
ooooh delicious!! aren't you the schemer.
my only problem, too many rhymes in the second stanza.
but keep everything else
especially the last stanza-it gave me shivers. 9
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| Re: papercut suicide by papercut |
6-Apr-03/4:43 PM |
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some of the adjectives are drammatical and very unecessary....pretentious even. take some of them out before they drown out the rest of your thoughts
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| Re: Me against Me by TruthlessHero |
6-Apr-03/4:40 PM |
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mmm...you kindof mixed me up in the last paragraph but other than that suprisingly good
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