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papercut suicide (Free verse) by papercut
Ripped rainbows have circled the sky never seen of such a torn and tattered blue All I want to feel of are these satin sheets that were once pressed against your pink, sour lips But all I can feel are the cigarette burns you inflicted and now I'm just killing myself with papercuts Taste of this blood, taste of these ashes... as they drip with the rain and crawl on your face sharp, silky tears are frozen slicing through my eyes Dark, hollow veins are as stone cracking and splitting in two Pure, thick blood so icey cold trickles down my skin And though I'm drowning in sorrow here I would never take control over time to erase one word, or to turn left rather than right For the scream of agony and pain that forever screaches my love for you Marks this face with an innocent smile And how could I ever take such a thing for granted?

Up the ladder: Unlocking Happiness
Down the ladder: deleted scenes

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.8333335
Weighted score: 4.9551764
Overall Rank: 8708
Posted: April 5, 2003 1:07 AM PST; Last modified: April 5, 2003 1:07 AM PST
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Comments:
[7] Fear of Garbage @ 64.56.113.60 | 6-Apr-03/4:43 PM | Reply
some of the adjectives are drammatical and very unecessary....pretentious even. take some of them out before they drown out the rest of your thoughts
[5] horus8 @ 24.126.113.154 | 6-Apr-03/9:06 PM | Reply
You could add double the amount of the already doubled amount of simplistic adjectives that you used in this piece and still not manage to cut yourself. Perhaps instead you'll cut the cheese.
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