Re: Week End Justification by half.italian	16-Sep-06/2:42 AM
Not convinced by the use of 'rubber' as a verb, other than that it's pretty clear. I finished work for the summer yesterday, so I think this will apply tonight :-D Cool ending, btw
Re: The nymph steals the farm-son by <~>	16-Sep-06/2:47 AM
Sweet, nearly cute :-)
Re: Howl For Clarity (for Jeff Buckley) by Bachus	16-Sep-06/2:51 AM
Godly (man and poem)
regarding some deleted poem...	18-Sep-06/6:50 AM
You are a stunningly good poet, and there are far better people than I to pick through this. I do wonder, though, whether the end of line 3 ('are') is and error - the number doesn't match up with 'My voice', unless I am missing the point here. I may well be.
Re: weather poem part 7: a short, sudden gust by nypoet22	18-Sep-06/6:53 AM
'Weather' works fine as a verb in the last line; I read it that way the first time round. You might want to think about making the title a little more revealing - perhaps twisting round the Oscar Wilde quote 'The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about' (assuming I remembered the quote correctly). Of course, you run the risk of having a title longer than the poem that way.
Re: Morning Glory by moyah8	18-Sep-06/6:59 AM
'...and that's when I swore I saw the grim reaper' had me laughing aloud. I'm not sure if you're intending for this to be a 'vulgar' poem like the South Parkers here, or if it's meant in seriousness. Also, your username made me wonder if it's some kind of horus8 tribute.
regarding some deleted poem...	18-Sep-06/7:17 AM
I know I'm not one to talk about metre, but words like 'contingency' are awkwardly stressed for consistent metre, as are the prefixed and suffixed words. It would be far easier to read - and therefore enjoy - if it had a solid rhythm to it. At least, that's my take on it.
Re: The Secret by ecargo	19-Sep-06/7:50 AM
This is a miscarriage poem, right? You've got an odd timing in here - I can make most of it fit, but the first line throws it somewhat. With a slow reading it fits, but I found it still a little awkward. Are you entering the WWA?
Re: Sublime by nightowl	19-Sep-06/7:52 AM
Decent enough, could do with having the metre worked on though. I'd make the second line consistent with the internal rhymes of the other three. 'Companion/champion' is nice.
Re: Staring through you by creepshow	19-Sep-06/7:56 AM
Nasty poems work best with a solid structure for guidance. This, although undeniably nasty, could do with being structured. As it is, it reads like a stop-start collection of thoughts - which doesn't flow very well. By the way, do you really do all this?
Re: Pale Blue by MacFrantic	19-Sep-06/7:59 AM
Oh, I must have missed this when it was posted. Nice, stanzas 2 and 3 especially. Could do with working on the stresses a bit.
Re: Constipation by colbaby	19-Sep-06/8:01 AM
Oh, how I laughed. I thought it was only the British who were allowed this sort of humour.
Re: Fare Price (Final Version) by Wakeboarder20	19-Sep-06/8:05 AM
If I remember rightly, I quite liked the original. Decent enough edit, although I can never quite be sure whether you're religious or not.
Re: Head Exploding Mark 2 by pink_escape	19-Sep-06/8:06 AM
Genius title.
regarding some deleted poem...	19-Sep-06/8:14 AM
Greek philosopher?
Re: Jose Streets by SupremeDreamer	19-Sep-06/12:29 PM
Argh! The curse of the "'n" strikes again! I know, I know, I'm a Queen's English snob, I'll get over it one day... Anyway, I quite liked the story but struggled to get the beat to it. ecargo's better at this than me, but I do think it wants reworking, or maybe just reclassifying. Done as prose it would seem very akin to the monologue introduction to a character story (does need to be spoken though). Decent enough, let me know if you do any edits of this; I'd be interested to read :-)
Re: Last flight of a goose by Bobjim	19-Sep-06/12:49 PM
Agreed with richa, order it 3,4,1,2. This is legendary :-)
Re: Rain by flock	20-Sep-06/12:14 PM
Nice.
Re: The Surfer's Prayer by flock	20-Sep-06/12:18 PM
This would be excellent if you could put some more deep, rolling words in to imitate the sound of the sea. Last stanza is nice, although the last line seemed short (not a huge problem though). As ecargo says, beware cliches :-)
Re: In the hollow (rough) by ecargo	20-Sep-06/12:26 PM
Love the content, don't love the mixed stresses at the line ends (you can tell I've been reading about this stuff, can't you? Credit/blame must go to Stephen Fry) - you could get away with all feminine endings in the first stanza (representing the little girl) but in stanza 2 where you talk about 'hard hands' and 'jagged voices' I'd make the line end sharply. Can't complain about the imagery though, and the language, as always, is beautiful :-)