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The Surfer's Prayer (Free verse) by flock Floating on a sea of troubles,
I'm calm.
I see the sun set slowly in the sky
While the waves gently toss me.
Too deep to feel the bottom.
Too cold to feel my feet.
What lies beneath,
I cannot tell.
What flies above,
I know too well.
Who knows what dangers I will meet
While drifting on the swell.
I thank the Lord for thickened skin.
I thank Him for a second wind.
I thank Him for the strength to match
And every wave I catch.
Up the ladder:
spiders and butterflies
Down the ladder:
Drops of Pain
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 5.2
Posted: September 20, 2006 9:55 AM PDT; Last modified: September 20, 2006 9:55 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.0238404 Overall Rank: 7432 Comments:
This would be excellent if you could put some more deep, rolling words in to imitate the sound of the sea. Last stanza is nice, although the last line seemed short (not a huge problem though). As ecargo says, beware cliches :-)
What the "Lord" has to do with it, I really D.K.
everything.
everthing and then some. well said. keep riding them waves of life with vigor and with dreams. to god be all the glory. x
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I thought the very same thing when I wrote it, but it worked well enough, so I left it as is.