on The Forgetting by Dovina
5 Jan 2006, 7:20 AM
Congrats on Divorcing Tennessee! Sorry I still don't know what to think of this one.
on Romans 8:28 by amanda_dcosta
29 Dec 2005, 2:28 PM
I agree. Rhyme or don't rhyme, not both. It's fixable. Just read it over and over aloud and work out the bugs.
on some deleted poem
4 Jan 2006, 7:08 AM
Youe may have some. jsp-id?=16876
on some deleted poem
4 Jan 2006, 7:10 AM
2 things. I think we need a designation for "beat poem" and I was really looking forward to a rhyme with pathological. If you slipped it in there, kudos.
on Sunlighting by ALChemy
4 Jan 2006, 8:11 PM
Fuck witty. Though it's all I have at the moment. I'll take quality (like yours) over witty any day of the week.
I think l-3 could lose the (the) and be A-OK. fackit. 10
I think l-3 could lose the (the) and be A-OK. fackit. 10
on Birmingham gardens by INTRANSIT
8 Jan 2006, 8:58 AM
The -for now- and the -meanwhile- had to go.
on Pledge by http://mulberryfairy
8 Jan 2006, 9:03 AM
I don't wanna hear it.
on some deleted poem
7 Jan 2006, 7:05 PM
Signed. Sealed. Delivered.
on greymo(u)rn by lmp
8 Jan 2006, 12:39 PM
"the whole effect was a draining of color from the landscape" You've already shown us this, why tell?
And then "safe and vulnerable" is all you need there as well.
And then "safe and vulnerable" is all you need there as well.
on Blackout, Amman, November, 2005 by zodiac
8 Jan 2006, 3:34 PM
Too many options to list. See dealer for details.
Serious juju. Sorry, I'm still from the Rothian camp. Do you just like to play with little balls? I'll stop now. Gotta visit the loo. I'll check back with scrawl a little later. Brain is cooking today. Hope I can post my newest "over there". Thanks fo' da hep!
on What Matters by Dovina
9 Jan 2006, 8:49 AM
This reads like a sentence in a novel to me. I hate to hardcore you like that but, it's flat.
on Birmingham gardens by INTRANSIT
10 Jan 2006, 11:39 AM
Any last crits? It's gong in the mail today. Thanks guys!
on I, Ann Boleyn by http://mulberryfairy
10 Jan 2006, 8:02 AM
Poems like this make me so proud to be male. not
on When God is Needed No More by ALChemy
24 Jan 2006, 1:21 PM
maybe someday I'll get to a poem first and actully have something to say.
on In praise of racism by INTRANSIT
24 Jan 2006, 1:01 PM
Well, there went a perfectly good 6.0
on A Sheep’s Wish by Dovina
24 Jan 2006, 1:18 PM
e-c has most of it nailed but, "choose me a mate"? Drop the -me- and i shant be bugged a-more.
on The Glass by dancin_n_da_moonlite
24 Jan 2006, 4:21 PM
Blow this up. by that I mean add to it. talk more about the rim or the fit or scratches. this could be a meat and potatoes meal. add everything you can think of. then post again and I'll do what I can to help.