Re: a comment on The Glass by dancin_n_da_moonlite |
24-Jan-06/4:37 PM |
thank you for the good advice.....
I will try to edit it as such, in the next few days or so
-megan
|
|
|
|
Re: Before Existence by Jsylum |
9-Apr-05/9:57 AM |
i love some of the imagery
|
|
|
|
Re: Rustling Wind by laura2224rn |
9-Apr-05/9:53 AM |
i'm sorry but there is no answer to all the worldy grief's - that is one question that has puzzled philosophers for centuries
|
|
|
|
Re: The Masonic Underling & the 33 degree by horus8 |
9-Apr-05/9:44 AM |
again,this is senryu not haiku
|
|
|
|
Re: Kansas City by PodPoet |
9-Apr-05/9:26 AM |
|
|
Re: You Were There by danevie |
9-Apr-05/9:14 AM |
you have the disconcerting habit of having someone remedy your ills in the past tense while you are still in the present-----
|
|
|
|
Re: Within A World by forestchild7 |
9-Apr-05/9:04 AM |
"as if it wil all my problems mend" ---- if you can't make your rhyming sound at all natural perhaps you should not try rhyming - this sounds incredibly forced
|
|
|
|
Re: Coloured waifs home by horus8 |
8-Apr-05/6:54 PM |
this is actually a senryu
|
|
|
|
Re: Biased. by darby pyn |
6-Apr-05/10:04 AM |
|
|
Re: NIGHTMILK SUNBLOOD by horus8 |
6-Apr-05/10:01 AM |
you have the unnerving habit of writing poems twice the length they need to be,
have you considered seeing the dali exhibit in philly?
|
|
|
|
Re: ?? by timvick473662003 |
6-Apr-05/9:57 AM |
|
|
Re: Everytime by krazymofo321 |
6-Apr-05/9:50 AM |
nice sentiment but its really not that original, and sounds kind of pimply
|
|
|
|
Re: Nobody's Story (A guide thru chaos) by horus8 |
4-Apr-05/9:45 AM |
10 because i didnt think someone could keep my attention for 14 minutes but you did -
|
|
|
|
Re: The Long Night by Tangerines |
4-Apr-05/9:34 AM |
i like the way this paints a pictures of the person, but is simply written
|
|
|
|
Re: What Does it Mean to be Human by Sterling5583 |
4-Apr-05/9:33 AM |
good questions - not sure how well it would work in lyrical form....
|
|
|
|
Re: Pleas Dont.. by MysticalRaven88 |
4-Apr-05/9:31 AM |
we all suffer - suck it up
if your feeling sad - this may sound good to you but to the rest of world its dribble - try writing about sadness when you're happy and happiness when you're sad - it works better that way
|
|
|
|
Re: Was it real by mishy_lee |
4-Apr-05/9:27 AM |
"i'm dying here slowly" - this part sounds nice - but the rest seems kind of forced --
|
|
|
|
Re: Icarus Down by horus8 |
4-Apr-05/9:25 AM |
|
|
Re: Glory Bound by kazeaki |
4-Apr-05/9:21 AM |
"let them say you are of nothing made".....the whole inverting words to make things rhymes just doesnt sound good..
|
|
|
|
Re: Into My World by sliver |
2-Apr-05/11:11 AM |
|
|