| Re: As You Are by MacFrantic |
12-May-04/8:05 AM |
|
that is quite ambitious, and i think you pulled it off reasonably well.
|
|
|
 |
| Re: FINGER PIE by titan69 |
12-May-04/3:04 PM |
|
that is the smelliest poem ever written. 10
|
|
|
|
| Re: EGG by ?-Dave_Mysterious-? |
13-May-04/6:05 AM |
I think it becomes a little redundant, oblong as it were toward the end. I like the first stanza. But from there is seems to drag a little. the ending is powerful but it feels a trifle long.
i would take an e or 2 out of the final line, and perhaps add a bit more repetition to the middle.
|
|
|
|
| Re: THE BEST POEM EVER!!!!!! by ?-Dave_Mysterious-? |
13-May-04/6:12 AM |
|
best poem i ever read. I wouldnt change a thing...0
|
|
|
|
| Re: untitled: dedicated to my soldier/husband by SweetJuliet10 |
14-May-04/5:48 AM |
very funny this one. Untitled, followed by a title.
if i had not read this, i would not believe that it could be written.
|
|
|
|
| Re: Tasha:dedicated to my dear friend by SweetJuliet10 |
14-May-04/5:50 AM |
furious with god...always have memories....
really special. best poem i have read in a long time. -0-
|
|
|
|
| Re: feelings of the inside by SweetJuliet10 |
14-May-04/5:52 AM |
|
take some tylenol, then take a class in English Fundamentals.
|
|
|
|
| regarding some deleted poem... |
14-May-04/1:32 PM |
|
i cannot imagine anything worse. should easily make the list. that is what you were going for, wasn't it? here is some help. -1-
|
|
|
|
| Re: The Ballad of Fraser Allonby Q.C., Barrister-At-Law by wFraser Allonby Q.C.w |
14-May-04/1:36 PM |
|
best poem i ever read -0-
|
|
|
|
| Re: On the Discovery of the Hated Tree and Another T.V. Dinner by MacFrantic |
17-May-04/9:25 AM |
|
I think we treeists...fucking hilarious -0-
|
|
|
|
| Re: LOVE-ABOVE LISTE by Everyone |
18-May-04/10:11 AM |
|
best poem i ever read, and every line rhymes with every other line. brilliant.
|
|
|
|
| Re: done than said by francis nor capule |
19-May-04/9:40 AM |
|
I don't like the last stanza. up until then, i had 10.
|
|
|
|
| Re: I miss my gummibear. by Freethinker1602 |
19-May-04/3:47 PM |
|
oi vey. whelp, here is a spin>>>>>>1 sorry, i cannot control the arbitrary nature of the spin.
|
|
|
|
| Re: Oh No! by foothangingoutofass |
23-May-04/1:34 PM |
|
by far the best poem i have read on this site. -0-
|
|
|
|
| regarding some deleted poem... |
24-May-04/6:04 AM |
|
|
|
| Re: and you by edwardo |
25-May-04/5:27 AM |
|
|
|
| regarding some deleted poem... |
26-May-04/5:44 AM |
|
Bob Dylan meets Laurel and Hardy...i will give you a spin....7
|
|
|
|
| Re: Suicide of the Ego by Drifting Shadow |
26-May-04/5:47 AM |
|
|
|
| regarding some deleted poem... |
26-May-04/5:50 AM |
|
not bad...the wording is a bit confusing at times and the middle could stand a little touching up...perhaps shave a few articles or pronouns....it has real potential, and i am looking forward to seeing it develop...interesting poem.
|
|
|
|
| Re: Child of Troy by Caducus |
27-May-04/10:25 AM |
|
in to ...this separation bothers me...but overall this is a really good poem.
|
|
|
|
