Re: Misconscrew by DeadtotheWorld	21-Jun-04/7:06 PM
Check the typos. If the music rocks hard enough this could be pretty good. As a poem it's too simplistic for my tastes, but with it's got loads of commitment.
Re: Origins by Doug	21-Jun-04/7:01 PM
psycho-babble
Re: a comment on The Freemasons by Bachus	16-Jun-04/8:27 PM
There once was an asshat named Doug Inept, contemptible and smug His comments were shallow His poems rank and callow His mind? As "torped" as mud
Re: a comment on Big wave by DR Limerick	15-Jun-04/3:33 PM
I've given over 2,700 comments, many of them positive, just lately the poems are terrible. That is not my fault.
Re: Dealer (a senyru) by Mona Lisa	15-Jun-04/3:30 PM
Thwere should be a period at the end of the 3rd line, or no puncuation at all.
Re: Girl and a Drugstore Novel by snacktime	15-Jun-04/3:24 PM
If poetry was a picnic, this would be potato salad that sat out int he sun too long.
Re: You can seize my smile by Prince of Void	15-Jun-04/3:19 PM
Your crowns on too tight.
Re: a comment on Windfall by wilco	14-Jun-04/8:47 PM
You're wrong. It's not shallow at all, you're just afraid of the deep end.
Re: Thin Blood by Rodavlas	14-Jun-04/8:43 PM
Exactly. Exactly right. You deserve to live.
Re: do you talk out loud in public? by peaceseeker	14-Jun-04/8:40 PM
I love this poem from the title on, but it's all a jumble. Sometimes it takes years.
Re: do you talk out loud in public? by peaceseeker	14-Jun-04/8:39 PM
Terrific insight. You need to narrow this universe down. Take it easy. This could be a great great poem. Slow it down a bit. Do some research, study words.
Re: Conscription by Caducus	14-Jun-04/8:35 PM
Great title, but you fall into the abyss at the 3rd line. It's a nice idea, how is it you always put to much sauce on the biscuits?
Re: A Chance to Say Goodbye by TLRufener	14-Jun-04/8:33 PM
Childish.
Re: Windfall by wilco	14-Jun-04/8:32 PM
Great title.
Re: Windfall by wilco	14-Jun-04/8:32 PM
Lucky you. This needs work, for example, the slender frame is unnecessary in the first line. Make it present tense.
Re: The Stickmen of Fools by embersandenvelopes	14-Jun-04/8:21 PM
Nice user name, but this poem is sadly magniloquent.
Re: Call Me by hatedestruction	14-Jun-04/8:19 PM
Meanderer.
Re: You and I by Lifeboatman	14-Jun-04/7:49 PM
This poem suffers from verbal dysenteria. Take two aspirins and shoot me in the morning.
Re: Big wave by DR Limerick	14-Jun-04/7:37 PM
Excellent.
Re: Lost by arduinn	14-Jun-04/7:17 PM
You write poems that sound like Yoda, or I should say, like Yoda sounds, poems you write.