Re: In Gold Leaf by bearhead	4-Aug-03/9:40 AM
Shouldn't it say w/ "owners' names". I like the ending.
Re: Sex on bugs by LuckyJoe	4-Aug-03/9:45 AM
I thought the pill was a "pill bug", you know, a "roly poly", (from the lobster family, no less), so I was too grossed out to answer any of your comprehensive questions.
Re: Parades for cripples (Shit bag) by Thome Plumpe by Bachus	4-Aug-03/9:51 AM
Pruney-licious. More typos than you usually permit, Bachus.
Re: American Eden by Don-Quixote	4-Aug-03/10:24 AM
Line 2: It's Line 3: society's code Line 6: It's (It's needs an apostrophe throughout) Maybe add something about the tortured's so-called "learned helplessness" self-pity instead of self pity I like the line about rusted eyelids. take the ashes of a war and turn it into solid bricks (change "it" to "them" - the ashes) and does not see pure white snow- maybe change to "the white purity" but a beautiful rainbow of color just waiting to be realized. (little too cliche there, maybe "a spectrum of colors aching to be released (or restored)" chained immediately since birth, - how about "chained immediately after birth" or "chained since birth" I like the last three lines. This has some good parts, but I think you need more fresh images. Some parts, especially earlier in the piece, are too teachy.
Re: father by girlandwords	4-Aug-03/10:26 AM
I think you mean muscles' pains, unless it is just one muscle that aches.
regarding some deleted poem...	4-Aug-03/10:32 AM
Nice.
Re: beauty by nolan	4-Aug-03/10:34 AM
Change breathe to breath. No need to remind us of the cliche "beauty is in the eye of the beholder".
Re: An Unreal Iowa December Night by LuckyJoe	4-Aug-03/10:38 AM
change breezes presents to "breezes' presents, also "froze" to "frozen"
Re: Damage by Caducus	4-Aug-03/10:40 AM
Been there. Some of the rhymes take away from how well you explained the process of becoming the one who hurt you.
Re: Fish by http://findingwater	4-Aug-03/6:10 PM
Interesting dream, coming from a vegetarian. Were they more appetizing with legs?
Re: Rainbows and fountains (pillow fights) by http://findingwater	4-Aug-03/6:13 PM
Can you really see the blue, violet, AND purple of the spectrum?
Re: Night Terrors by princesszoe	4-Aug-03/6:21 PM
Did you intentionally use the name of the phenomenon of "night terrors"- which is like a sleepwalking nightmare? I was looking for a relationship to the phenomenon in your poem. According to Dr. Spock, 3-6 year olds have them- they seem to be due to some temporary disturbance in the nervous system during deep sleep, they tend to run in families, all children who have the grow out of them within a few years, at most. When a child has a night terror, he/she wakes up screaming and even though his/her eyes are wide open s/he doesn't respond when you talk to him and it seems that he isn't even awaare of your presence. The night terror stops spontaneously after lasting as long as 30-40 minutes, the child falls asleep, and he never remembers anything about the episode in the morning.
Re: The Neckbrace of Evil by Bachus	4-Aug-03/6:25 PM
I think you should put a space between "on" and "to" and change "too" to "to" in the last line. What was the first "picture"? A wheelchair? The second a person in a car?
Re: Eight thousand clay tiles by abecedarian	4-Aug-03/6:37 PM
Nice ending. Hope you find the person.
regarding some deleted poem...	4-Aug-03/6:39 PM
"Wish I had only stopped and thank" didn't get this line.
regarding some deleted poem...	4-Aug-03/6:43 PM
I believe your title should be "The Junky's Lament" (or, w/ alternate spelling, "The Junkie's Lament" unless there are multiple junkies here, in which case it should be "The Junkies' Lament"
Re: my company by girlandwords	5-Aug-03/9:51 AM
"my feet move with the littlest grace" I think littlest should be replaced with smallest or tiniest. Also, I believe the second line should say "where scars meet bone and fade" so that your verb and subject can agree. (Plus it will make your rhyme better).
Re: My own Truism by Billy Fights	5-Aug-03/9:56 AM
Line 4- "meant" not ment Line 7- is Answers supposed to be capitalized (doesn't add much, if it is purposeful) Line 10- I think you mean "too"
Re: We'll be Louvers and shade by <{Baba^Yaga}>	5-Aug-03/10:03 AM
Attention: Britney (Pimple) by Ataryu I have not felt her angelic touch Which has to be so grace Nor the warmth of her lips Or her sweat embrace Didn't you copyright this sweat thing?
regarding some deleted poem...	5-Aug-03/10:08 AM
You forgot the category of poets whose primary themes are the world of poem ranker or their fellow poets on poemranker. By the way, only the RedSox (and WhiteSox) need change their sox.