| Re: FIRETRUCK by Garrett S Sexton |
1-Mar-03/1:17 AM |
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50? Uch! Good poem but that's gross. Some one better warn the mechanic.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
2-Mar-03/1:34 AM |
stanza 2 line 1: "shown"
A few of your "I"s need caps
The 3rd and 4th stanzas just seem out of place.
I like it but it needs work. (6 with the abilty to be worked up to an 8)
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| Re: For those who play with shit by <{Baba^Yaga}> |
2-Mar-03/6:02 PM |
Hmmmm....Topic isn't great. Style isn't great. Poem isn't great. I think I do detect a pattern. I expected better from you.
Next?
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| Re: For her he swam with sharks by Shardik |
2-Mar-03/6:09 PM |
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Hidden meaning? I can't find it. Your vagueness needs to be balanced with hints. Too much vague and you aren't understood. Too many hints and it's no fun.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
4-Mar-03/10:20 PM |
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I like it.. and I don't. I love the theme. I love the images. It just seemed too choppy to me. 6.
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| Re: Something for Lynn by Jeremi B. Handrinos |
5-Mar-03/1:19 AM |
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I really have nothing to say. I think it's about as solid as it gets. 9. And only cause I don't give 10's.
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| Re: Home by morffrom |
5-Mar-03/1:24 AM |
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Simple and nice. One question. Green air?
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| Re: Whales by Jeremi B. Handrinos |
5-Mar-03/1:32 AM |
I remember in third grade I wrote
Save the whales
Save them all
Save the whales
Big and small
I thought I was a genius. I later found out I was wrong.
"All(1)+ people(2)+ are(1)+ flawed(2)" = 6.
Maybe...
"All people are flaws"
It's a little harsher but it fits.
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| Re: Prometheus sang for vultures by horus8 |
5-Mar-03/2:11 PM |
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| Re: A Losing Streak by Jigg |
5-Mar-03/5:24 PM |
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The last line gave me quite the chuckle. The rest was decent enough. 6.
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| Re: The Drunkest ever by horus8 |
6-Mar-03/4:00 AM |
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I like it lots. I don't understand the last line's relevence but I'm sure you'd be happy to explain. By the way, is there an instant messanger program that you use? No need to put your sn up. Just tell me the program and I'll tell you mine. I'd like to ask you for some help with a piece that isn't even ready for this site yet. Mostly because it's more of an idea than a piece.
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| Re: Departing by scornofangels |
11-Mar-03/1:59 AM |
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Ahh.. someone gave you the classic "I'm a dick so I'll vote 0 with no reasoning." vote. I liked it though. Sad but determined not to be. Fatalism without resignation. 6.
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| Re: A Tale of Peter Pan by NewbieMe |
11-Mar-03/2:12 AM |
I don't really like Wendy's answer. I also don't like that they know they're characters in a book. Maybe if you made is something that actually worked with the way the story goes (He escapes for a while but then gets pulled back in a la Hook) Wendy's answer would be better. Just having her tell him that he can't change things doesn't work for me.
By the way "trap" in the 4th line from the end should be "trapped"
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
13-Mar-03/1:13 AM |
Just yesterday I checked in and thought "When is god'swife going to submit? I love her stuff"
Today I come and find not one but two great poems.
Could we have a translation of the Spanish? I almost have it but it's been a while since high school.
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| Re: What Do You Want From Me? by Bonehiss |
15-Mar-03/1:53 AM |
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You answered your own question. They just want to be friends. Sucks don't it?
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| Re: Horse meat & pistols by <{Baba^Yaga}> |
18-Mar-03/9:58 PM |
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Ahh poor Orson. :( I was rooting for him too. Oh well. 8.
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| Re: easy by kthulah |
21-Mar-03/2:30 AM |
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Easy? If I'm reading it right this is about unaquainted love being delt with. That's easy?
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
24-Mar-03/12:49 PM |
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9 points for the C&P. That's classic. I did notice a few typos though. You might want to edit those. I mean we all know that having your fingers a quarter of an inch off means you're a complete idiot. Right? Right.
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| Re: central line by kthulah |
24-Mar-03/12:55 PM |
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6. Everything after "monopoly on pain" just muddled it up.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
25-Mar-03/12:01 AM |
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I'd only be too happy if you were at the bottom of the ocean. Alas you are here and thus have freedom to post clever pieces like this.
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