regarding some deleted poem...	26-Mar-03/8:21 PM
Usually I love your stuff. Unfortunately understanding is part of that for me. That being said I cannot love this one. I just don't get it.
regarding some deleted poem...	27-Mar-03/11:10 PM
Point well made and well taken. I wish more people understood that. It doesn't make it any better but it does put things in perspective. I hope that this is fictional though. I cannot imagine what it would feel like to lose a child but having lost others I know part of the pain.
Re: Guitar Lesson by Dancer	28-Mar-03/10:17 AM
Line five: Smoke The rest: Good stuff.
Re: Day to Day by thepinkbunnyofdoom	29-Mar-03/1:02 PM
Line 4: absolutely Line 7: Seems kind of muddled. Maybe "As I stand in the raging storm on what was once a bright and sunny day" Line 8: If it's stormy it's not really empty. Maybe "stormy and gray" (Or synonymous words to avoid repetition) I don't understand some of the words you choose to capitalize. For a title, "Turbulence" ?
Re: Why? Pt 1 by hdw	31-Mar-03/12:53 AM
I like the last line. It really connects with the reader.
Re: 12 O'Clock New Year's Eve by hdw	31-Mar-03/1:02 AM
Try not to be offended by this. I'm going to be honest and blunt. If you just hate me and go on a spiteful rage that's ok, you wouldn't be the first one, but I'd rather you think about what I say. You are quite lacking as a poet. You have things to say, good first step. Now they need to be molded into something a bit more artistic. Mind you artistic words with no meaning aren't much fun either. We have more than enough of that on this site. Find the balence, come back and let us see. Try metaphor and similie. They help a lot. I'm looking forward to seeing an improvement from you. Good luck and happy writing.
Re: The cross roads by Jeremi B. Handrinos	31-Mar-03/1:34 PM
Nice. I like it. This style is fun to play with. 7.
regarding some deleted poem...	7-Apr-03/10:57 PM
Hmmmm.... nice descriptions. I like the face/glove simile. The subject matter is kind of dry but it's well written. 7
Re: Fraternity hazing the sheepdog by horus8	8-Apr-03/2:40 AM
Ummmm... Fun images but abstraction loses it's power when you can't follow the chord to a point. By the way, it's = it is. It's = the one belonging to it. (last stanza) Can you point me towards some of your more meaningful poems? I rather enjoy those.
regarding some deleted poem...	28-May-03/7:10 PM
"I wish that you had been the first You would have been the one I chose" Damn. I love those lines.
Re: To those who'd share their heartfelt feelings with the world by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.	3-Jun-03/1:24 PM
Stop reading about it. I've never forced you to read any of it. People generally write about what matters to them. You don't like it then just move on. No one gives a shit about what you give a shit about.
Re: Barometric pressure & true love (The prince of storms) by Jeremi B. Handrinos	4-Jun-03/1:53 PM
I always love how you follow the rhyming rules so loosely. I wish I had the guts to do it but I always feel like I'm doing something wrong. Good work :D
Re: Mommy Dearest by Babigurly69	8-Jun-03/5:30 PM
You're really... You're my..... you're not
Re: Moo Gai Pai lover (dedicated to Settle) by Sylvia Bravo	8-Jun-03/9:20 PM
Call my wife and tell her about Moo Gai Pengs and I could be Call my wife and tell her of me and Moo Gai Pengs to at least leave somewhat of a rhyme going
regarding some deleted poem...	10-Jun-03/11:24 AM
Hmmm... Usually Spring is associated with... err... lovers and Summer is associated wih marriage. I like the twist (assuming that is what you were talking about)
regarding some deleted poem...	12-Jun-03/3:20 AM
The best part about being gay? No femine hygine products under the sink. Woo Hoo! Oh and again, well done my lady.
regarding some deleted poem...	12-Jun-03/3:34 AM
YAY for Aurthur. I wouldn't want to work with someone I loved though. Even if I only loved them in a "I want to fuck you" way. Fantasies don't do me any good any more. Actually they never did but now I realize it.
Re: Hot Potato by Shardik	18-Jun-03/9:38 PM
I just ask them if they're ready for the coming of the snake. When they look confused I whip out my penis.
Re: The truths of war by DeadtotheWorld	18-Jun-03/11:16 PM
Are = our
regarding some deleted poem...	19-Jun-03/2:05 AM
I think this would be a concrete poem. Not a good one but one none the less