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Day to Day (Free verse) by thepinkbunnyofdoom All the white Clouds have turned Gray
From the darkest Points comes the Lightning
Fully charged With angry Honesty
Shouting loud And absolutely Clear
Only to be drowned Out by the pouring Rain
The troubled waters Fall and surround Us
As I stand in the raging storm on What was once a bright and sunny happy
Day
I have to wonder if It'll ever be sunny Again.
Up the ladder:
New Leaf
Down the ladder:
E tu trabajo el prostitute
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 7.8
Posted: March 29, 2003 7:28 AM PST; Last modified: March 29, 2003 2:14 PM PSTWeighted score: 6.4 Overall Rank: 778 Comments:
Bit strange, at least your work is varied!
I'm trying to go with more medifores instead of just emoting all the time. I'm still working on this one tho cause I think that the meaning is just a little too deeply buried get thru.
This poem was just again, growing in style.
adjectives & adverbs:
white gray darkest fully angry loud absolutely clear troubled(waters of course, what else) raging bright sunny happy sunny Stop watching Nickelodeon and read The Colossus by Slyvia Plath. I give up, your all abunch of puddin'heads. 281 view(s)
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Line 7: Seems kind of muddled. Maybe "As I stand in the raging storm on what was once a bright and sunny day"
Line 8: If it's stormy it's not really empty. Maybe "stormy and gray" (Or synonymous words to avoid repetition)
I don't understand some of the words you choose to capitalize. For a title, "Turbulence" ?
The Caps. are just the first center and last word. I'll give it a title when I finish it but I like your Idea.