Re: The Church in Nagasaki by Staika	28-May-02/2:36 PM
I like this so much that I logged on despite being otherwise occupied mostly right now, to say how much I like it. It has a voice all right. Reminds me of .. oddly, of cummings in his this kind of mode; and I really like and admire cuimmings' poetry
Re: i'm bad at waiting by silvertongueddevil	21-May-02/4:00 PM
Brilliant! I LOVE it!! sopoignantfunnylisteningcute
Re: as the hostage by silvertongueddevil	21-May-02/11:33 AM
fanTASTic gotcha!
Re: geometry by skaskowski	21-May-02/11:32 AM
self-pity puts me off and never seems like poetry to me; almost its impossible. poetry a true voice, I hear self-deception here.. and real poetic ability, squandered,
Re: Do Not Pay Taxes To Feed Those Layabout Scum by ruella	21-May-02/11:12 AM
do you do pictures too? It really suggests an illustrator.. I see the darkling leers ...
Re: Do Not Pay Taxes To Feed Those Layabout Scum by ruella	21-May-02/11:11 AM
do you do picturse too? It really suggests an illustrator.. I see the darkling leers ...
Re: Wicked Danny, A Lesson For You All by ruella	21-May-02/11:06 AM
this is funny and Struwwelpeter brought uptodateish and takethepissish with considerable success - i'd dump the "ye" tho, sounds dangerously as if it might be taking itself too seriously, out of place.....; shaggy dog metre.
Re: All teeth when not. by ifni	21-May-02/9:27 AM
i like this
Re: #15 by mikejedw	21-May-02/9:26 AM
hmm this one doesn't do it for me. I guess i don't feel that way about the telephone pole, maybe an adventurer; so the knot at the end slips ...
Re: would i be considered crazy by silvertongueddevil	21-May-02/8:59 AM
how cool the interaction between surface and slippery slid-down
Re: Sansho-shima by spoink	19-May-02/6:45 AM
what's the title mean??? you seem better off without her. Get out more
Re: Conversation Unspoken by JuddNelson	19-May-02/6:40 AM
first draft
Re: To Anorexia, Wherever I May Find Her by JuddNelson	19-May-02/6:39 AM
not very interesting, the thgouth is a cliche and so are many of the phrases .. "lethal precision". Prune .. images mixed smartly, just smart. smart and not deep.
Re: Black Hearted Graffiti Writer by mogwai	19-May-02/6:36 AM
I like this caught a movement of spirit and watched it whirl
Re: Anger Management by wlshepherd	19-May-02/6:35 AM
not a poem; this is diary notes (to edit out in case of publication) you feel mad SOMETIMES when you get angry..? how about those other times? they could be more interesting..not if you stay on the surface of nothing at all though
Re: Out Doubt! by wlshepherd	19-May-02/6:32 AM
what then, what do you want??? whjy wait to write this, who do you have to tell? why tease the reader?? what do you see that is this everything?????? is it still? (vacillation by the way)
Re: Louisiana Lovers by wdallan	19-May-02/6:02 AM
patchy...the rhythm comes and goes, not under cointrol .. sometimes 5 sometimes 4 stresses in a line something really nice about it, a lazy afternoon, this well visioned clip... the colour, the mixed emotions, but oh dump cliches like "with fear and trepidation" "the lovers with joy to Heaven will march" --- there is going to be a better version of the last line than that and "franticly bails" - not "franticly"... indeed better no advertb at all, unless it's an unpredictable one... a counter-theme love them fishes can a boat sink in a marsh?? or indeed sail in one??? is it a lake..??? they might be there in a moment, heaven I mean.....
Re: #11 by mikejedw	19-May-02/3:37 AM
so adept you are at packing the poem as dialectic this is another hit! thank you
Re: #7 by mikejedw	19-May-02/3:35 AM
lovely my expectations of you are now no less you melting here into clarity
Re: Summer Vacation by weeb	19-May-02/3:31 AM
Lovely, makes me laugh. the art of just how much to say and how to put it together; you stay on the tightrope and the result is a smile that goes on...