| Re: a comment on Gothic by zodiac |
3-Dec-06/4:35 PM |
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| Re: a comment on upon driving through rural Washington by david |
8-Jul-05/8:54 PM |
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| Re: a comment on "The Buick", or, "to my grandfather" by david |
8-Jul-05/8:48 PM |
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Tremendously flattering comments. Thank you.
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| Re: While flipping over stones by <{Baba^Yaga}> |
26-Jun-04/9:38 AM |
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I get the impression that this could be a far better piece without the constraints of the rhyme pattern. As it is, it feels a little disjointed and forced in parts, if only to fit the structure you've imposed on it.
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| Re: a comment on First Kiss by david |
12-Jun-04/9:06 PM |
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I didn't 'cop' the idea, no.
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| Re: The daisy-chain girl by richa |
11-Jun-04/10:54 AM |
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Lyrically, I have no problem. The language is tightly-wound and it sounds good. The issue I take, though, is more typographical in nature. The enjambment of the lines and that punctuation aren't doing anything for me, and I find it a little distracting to the point where it's detracting from my enjoyment of the piece.
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| Re: Bugs by INTRANSIT |
11-Jun-04/10:50 AM |
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Gorgeous the way it is right now. Don't change a thing.
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| Re: a comment on Earth, or, When You Take Me From This Good Rich Soil by david |
21-Nov-03/5:07 PM |
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More, hm? I'll see what I can do.
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| Re: Independence Day (the speech from the film) by scitz |
5-Jul-03/11:06 PM |
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While I don't necessarily object to adaptation (some of the finest poems have been birthed in such a fashion), there ought to be some effort put into the finished product. I see little evidence of such. No enjambment, no typographical changes. For all I know, you could have very well copy-and-pasted this from a web page. What's the difference between this and plagiarizing Shakespeare, Milton, Ginsberg, or Atwood?
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| Re: a comment on touch of the grass by david |
5-Jul-03/10:57 PM |
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Thank you. It's one that I've had sitting about for some time now, scrawled hastily on a piece of looseleaf. I recently found it in a coat pocket that I was taking in to be drycleaned, and I thought it would be of sufficient quality to post here.
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| Re: Iterated Fuck by nentwined |
4-Jul-03/10:06 PM |
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Not tonight, nentwined. I have a headache.
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| Re: missing time by Bill Z Bub |
4-Jul-03/8:17 PM |
The diction is mellifluous. I am particularly struck by the enjambment and how it seems to contribute to the overall feeling of how well-crafted the piece is.
The only thing I take issue with is the question posed in the ninth stanza. While the diction and intent match, it seems awkward enough there to interrupt the flow of the piece.
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| Re: a comment on touch of the grass by david |
4-Jul-03/7:24 PM |
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Much obliged, my good man.
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| Re: My last ever poemranker transmission by King Abdullah II |
4-Jul-03/3:46 PM |
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I'm reminded of how Aristotle once said that man, like elephants and bees, are inherently political animals.
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| Re: a comment on Night Letter to Yahweh by david |
4-Jul-03/3:34 PM |
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| Re: a comment on granite hearts by david |
4-Jul-03/2:07 PM |
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| Re: Killbirds by <{Baba^Yaga}> |
4-Jul-03/1:38 PM |
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I'm inclined to give a higher rating, if only because vilanelles are so difficult to write well. You've taken to the structure, and the narrative flow of the piece is intriguing.
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| Re: I am talented & good looking damnit! by <{Baba^Yaga}> |
4-Jul-03/1:28 PM |
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The repetition in this piece is delightful and well-crafted. There are certainly many cases of repetition ruining a poem, but this certainly isn't one of them.
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| Re: MotherF*ckers Who Fuck Above/Two Story Apartment by JoyLuck |
4-Jul-03/1:14 PM |
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A wonderful piece in the tradition of concrete and typographical poetry. Well done.
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| Re: a comment on of the bad hard drive by david |
4-Jul-03/12:54 PM |
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It is, yes. I'm surprised; I thought it would be fairly obvious. It's interesting to hear the other interpretations, though.
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