Re: Cupid Missed Two Junkies (slightly clearer, rambling draft) by Ranger	amanda_dcosta 203.145.159.44	15-May-06/10:08 PM
Hi Ranger, truthfully, I still don't get what your poem is about. Having a rough idea is not enough. Sorry to disappoint. I refrain from voting.
Re: The Prodigal Daughter by Dovina	amanda_dcosta 203.145.159.44	15-May-06/10:19 PM
Very heartfelt and beautiful. I'd like it too if there was enough punctuation. And the partial rhyme scheme is distracting. Nevertheless, I think you deserve nothing less than an 8.
Re: Nightfall by Niphredil	amanda_dcosta 203.145.159.44	15-May-06/10:31 PM
I think this is well written and I especially like the last lines of each stanza, esp. the repetitions.
Re: After Rain by Niphredil	amanda_dcosta 203.145.159.44	15-May-06/10:43 PM
Lovely. I just have a vague idea of what a sonnetis especially the rhyming scheme, which I think you have stuck to, and apart from that, the content is good. I especially liked the third verse, the line...'A holocaust of car exhaust as brutal boots crashed down'.
Re: Cat Feet by Niphredil	amanda_dcosta 203.145.159.44	15-May-06/10:52 PM
Ha ha ha. This is what I think you would call selective deafness and being paranoid at the same time. Ah yes, scrolling down, I see that my impression has already been impressed upon by others. This is lovely. I wonder how many of us fit into this category. You ofcourse, have qualified.
Re: The Bleeding Rose by BleedingRose	amanda_dcosta 203.145.159.44	15-May-06/11:10 PM
Bleeding Rose, there are quite contridictory ideas coming through. MAybe , you should edit it to either a love mood or to a hate mood. By you mixing the two, we are not sure what you want to emphasise on. Being specific gives you additional points. And I really wonder who this jerk is, going around giving a zero to all your poems. Maybe he needs a double dose of his own medicine.
Re: Plastic Posies by BleedingRose	Ranger 62.252.32.15	16-May-06/4:44 AM
This is damn funny, there are a few rhythmic inconsistencies but if they were ironed out this would be excellent. And for the first time in years I don't mind the rhyme of heart/part, for that you get bonus points.
regarding some deleted poem...	Niphredil 132.69.238.35	16-May-06/4:47 AM
I beg your pardon? 'Bright and parfaited"? 'Parfait', last time I checked, was a yummy frozen ice-cream dessert. I can't imagine that's what you wanted to say.
Re: The Prodigal Daughter by Dovina	Niphredil 132.69.238.35	16-May-06/4:52 AM
Sorry, personally I didn't care for this. It sounds a tad preachy and not original enough by far. I also found the "maybe-yes, maybe-no" rhyming distracting. Nitpick: Why does her father need to forgive her in the stanza before last? He already did in the second stanza. He even came visiting.
Re: Mannequin by Roisin	Niphredil 132.69.238.35	16-May-06/4:56 AM
Oh, fun. Me likee. -8- I rather enjoy the spacing, even though I don't get what it's supposed to mean... it seems rigid; I connected it to squeezing indviduals into a predetermined mold, and so it felt appropriate.
Re: Supposition Now by MacFrantic	Niphredil 132.69.238.35	16-May-06/4:57 AM
I don't get it. Written beautifully and all, but... what? Clarification would be welcome.
Re: To Brittany by amanda_dcosta	Niphredil 132.69.238.35	16-May-06/5:04 AM
What I really appreciate about your poetry, Amanda - and I think it's especially clear in this one - is the feeling of innocence and joy that radiates through. Great job, and a pleasure to read.
Re: Twilight on the Roadside by ALChemy	Niphredil 132.69.238.35	16-May-06/5:08 AM
Do you know, by the last line I also had a lump in my throat. Of course the poem could be polished up a little more - poems always can, darn them! - but this is so vivid and touching that you can't help but reflect your feelings upon the reader. That's a priceless quality. -9- for emotion.
Re: "My Love" by wickedemon4	Edna Sweetlove 81.178.126.155	16-May-06/5:26 AM
Very funny. I love bonfire being 2 words. Hard to know if this is intentionally bad, if so 10/10. But I think you don't know any better, so 0/10. Keep up the funny work as I am smiling happily at this.
Re: A Snap Shot by amanda_dcosta	Niphredil 132.69.238.35	16-May-06/5:27 AM
Don't I wish I was there ;-) My favorite stanzas are the first, for clarity and scene-setting, and "the sun dived in"... terrific.
Re: Tin Can Longings by phoenixxx	Edna Sweetlove 81.178.126.155	16-May-06/5:28 AM
Nostalhic but spoiled by using the repulsive non-word "yeah". I'd have given it 8/10, but with 2 "yeahs" there is a price to be paid: 2/10.
Re: Peeping Through The Window by Edna Sweetlove	Ranger 62.252.32.15	16-May-06/5:28 AM
Lear was like a god to me when I was younger, so limericks always seem to lack something without illustrations. But please don't submit a picture with this one. Pussy/juicy? I'd rather have seen front/blunt.
Re: Plastic Posies by BleedingRose	Niphredil 132.69.238.35	16-May-06/5:30 AM
Damn. If it were me, you'd get those plastic posies stuck where the sun don't shine... but hilarious nonetheless.
Re: Mid-July by Ranger	Edna Sweetlove 81.178.126.155	16-May-06/5:31 AM
Goes on a bit. A bit over-written ("Oh Death!....) Not bad though.
Re: Pot Haikus (Ode to Stoners) by Shardik	Ranger 62.252.32.15	16-May-06/5:33 AM
One of the funniest things I've read all week!