poemranker ::Tin Can Longings by phoenixxx

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Free verse № 52690

Tin Can Longings

Member since 2003 · Posted 12 Jun 2003 · 4 comments

Tin can longings Its a quarter past two When I see you across our alley In your red and yellow room So I pick up that old tin can Where we used to rendezvous And share my secret longings On our telephone with you Sure, one hundred years have past Since we made that alley home And everything has changed On those streets we used to roam And yeah, a decade's come and gone And my childhood's left alone And, oh a hundred years ago If yesterday we'd known We talked tonight on the tin can phone Shared our world beneath the stars And memories have come and gone To Jupiter, to Mars And yeah, our childhood is gone And we're wishing from afar But I am always with you now No matter where you are.

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mean 3.38 weighted 3.82 rank 13470 views 191 View voting details →

13 votes so far. Yours would make 14.13 votes so far

4 comments

[10] Edna Sweetlove 16-May-06/5:28 AM Reply
Nostalhic but spoiled by using the repulsive non-word "yeah". I'd have given it 8/10, but with 2 "yeahs" there is a price to be paid: 2/10.
[10] Edna Sweetlove › Edna Sweetlove 16-May-06/5:29 AM Reply
My apologies for mis-spelling "nostalgic" but I can't see how to correct my typo.
[n/a] Ranger › Edna Sweetlove 16-May-06/5:36 AM Reply
You can't - there's no 'edit comment' button. And, let's face it, that's probably a good thing. Nobody credible is going to criticise typos in comments.
[10] Edna Sweetlove 11-Jun-06/6:02 PM Reply
utter horseturd