| Re: Kill me by little_big_nose |
9-Jan-04/7:52 PM |
hm... I'm not much of a "ranker" ... but I give it a seven...
I don't think i understood
"Bury me
Six feet-deep, with care
Woulden't want anyone to find me
Life was way too fair" ... um, maybe thats just me.
or
"I didn't deserve to live on your Earth" ? ... I thought life was fair?
all in all, I liked it... just those lines, above, got me confused...
|
|
|
 |
| Re: Fake Happiness by WithoutLife |
9-Jan-04/8:10 PM |
AH! I love this piece! ..so sad, but the lines
"Friends enjoy the sweet snacks of our get together,
But numbness has seized my taste buds." ...amazing!
whoever gave you a one - THEY should be the ones' in sadness, not you.
|
|
|
|
| Re: Tragic Love by WithoutLife |
9-Jan-04/8:33 PM |
|
once again... amazed by your words
|
|
|
|
| Re: Endless Sleep by WithoutLife |
9-Jan-04/8:41 PM |
|
..so basically you are sad/mad about waking up in the morning, so you go back to sleep and become happy again? I feel the same way... everyone does. haha
|
|
|
|
| Re: Soft Speak; Hard Emotion by Blindpoetry |
2-Feb-04/8:22 PM |
Wow... A 0?
Please post what I did wrong, or what I need to work on. please? thanks.
|
|
|
|
| Re: Beauty Sleep by Billy Biff-Chin |
4-Feb-04/3:49 PM |
|
|
|
| Re: A Different Point Of View by Billy Biff-Chin |
4-Feb-04/3:51 PM |
|
|
|
| Re: Digging A Grave by Billy Biff-Chin |
4-Feb-04/3:52 PM |
|
|
|
| Re: Soft Beak; Hard lotion by Bachus |
4-Feb-04/7:43 PM |
|
|
|
| Re: Ducks With AIDs (a feeble attempt of something different) by Blindpoetry |
6-Feb-04/3:27 PM |
oops I over-looked a typo.
"says" in the 28 days later part is really "days"
sorry.
|
|
|
|
| regarding some deleted poem... |
6-Feb-04/8:00 PM |
"Do you jerk, jerk
Jerk jerk jerk it,
Before or after here?"
well... I've never really seen one word repeated 5 times in a row and in the same stanza. Kinda odd, dontcha think?
|
|
|
|
| Re: âIâll Drop You Off At The Next Cornerâ by Blindpoetry |
8-Mar-04/7:32 PM |
Ok, obviously ,what i thought was good wasn't good.
:-/
I know this isn't poetry, but can anyone donate critiquing? I'm desperate, now, for this one.
|
|
|
|
| Re: Colors Collide by Blindpoetry |
25-Mar-04/7:42 PM |
When colors collide and make one color, it will turn into a different color, correct? ... and if all the colors in the world collided, then the resulting color would, in fact, be black. Black meaning confusion and distaste, maybe? ...you know that if you mix the colors that they will all turn black, but you don't know why...
Kind of like this poem. I 'collided' all of my thoughts and made them turn into a 'black' color... Confusion and distaste, if not any other adjective.
You know that if you mix all of your thoughts togather, they won't make any sense, but you don't know why.
Or maybe we do.
Because the words don't make sense? ... but colors make sense. You see the black, don't you? ... and you see the words.
So you don't know why. You see the words. You see the black.
You don't understand why the words don't make sense. Why can't they be re-arranged to make sense?
...Why is the color black the resulting color? ... Why not pink, blue, brown, red, purple? ...
Eh... Thats how i think of the poem and how i named it... - of course, this could make no sense, whatsoever and I could be making a fool of myself (which is was i'm feeling right now) .... But... I think its healthy to express my thoughts every once in a while, don't you think?
|
|
|
|
| Re: Watching The Rose Grow by Blindpoetry |
31-Mar-04/5:36 PM |
|
- I guess I forced rhyming to much... But everything sounded so much in tune to the rhythm I have in my head. So, I'm keeping it. And I also love what I wrote about. It's not sad, not angery, but a bit happy. Almost, but not to much into the happy mix. Just right outside the door. - But I wrote this in a cheery mood, so... what does that have to say?
|
|
|
|
| Re: Help Me Water The Garden by Blindpoetry |
13-Apr-04/11:58 AM |
a bit weird looking, eh?
The third stanza is supposed to have four lines
|
|
|
|
| regarding some deleted poem... |
21-Apr-04/5:51 PM |
8 - 2 - 3?
For some reason, I thought haikus were 5 - 7 - 5...
|
|
|
|
| regarding some deleted poem... |
21-Apr-04/5:59 PM |
wow, please explain your logic towards this haiku!
only two lines 7 - 6 - ??
Whoa... I must be trippin'
|
|
|
|
| Re: To Be Happy by embersandenvelopes |
25-Apr-04/9:42 AM |
|
I got that Don't worry, be happy song stuck in my head after reading this...
|
|
|
|
| regarding some deleted poem... |
25-Apr-04/9:46 AM |
Very good.
Only thing I had a problem with was
'Let It Be' ... It just tickled my nerves a little. But thats just me. 0_o;
|
|
|
|
| Re: Jesus, I funneled enough beer to marry that? by Bachus |
19-May-04/7:35 PM |
your talking about the band, Audioslave, correct?
I believe that is one word... 'Audioslave'...
|
|
|
|
