on some deleted poem
13 Jul 2005, 7:18 PM
Replace lies with lives and we'll talk.
on the smallest box will do by elderking
14 Jul 2005, 8:14 AM
I liked this one.
Except, for being an ignorant 15yroldbrat, what's C.O.D.?
Except, for being an ignorant 15yroldbrat, what's C.O.D.?
on A Good Man Ruined by Dovina
17 Jul 2005, 10:43 PM
kind[of] like a poet
woot.
woot.
on some deleted poem
9 Nov 2005, 7:44 PM
wait.wait.wait.wait.wait.
this isn't my batman mug.
this isn't my batman mug.
on Mandarin Trial by cyan9
9 Nov 2005, 7:48 PM
It was nice.
line 6: A[n] irridescent...
third stanza looks out of place with the repeated phrase: I lay back into the sheets...
line 6: A[n] irridescent...
third stanza looks out of place with the repeated phrase: I lay back into the sheets...
on Close To The Beginning by RawPunkGirl
13 Nov 2005, 3:04 PM
I find it very odd that I see you on multiple websites.
And i'm not even a stalker.
On another note:
Line 3: I think that 'Being dressed in my best...' should be changed. Keep the idea, but change the wording so it doesn't rhyme. Because it sounds horrible.
overall, though, I thought it was ok.
And i'm not even a stalker.
On another note:
Line 3: I think that 'Being dressed in my best...' should be changed. Keep the idea, but change the wording so it doesn't rhyme. Because it sounds horrible.
overall, though, I thought it was ok.
on Returning Home by Niphredil
18 Dec 2005, 8:30 AM
might want to take an adjective or and adverd out of second stanza, line 4 - just so there isn't one line poking out like a sword, or a knife. or some other objects.
i enjoyed it
i enjoyed it
on disaster in the flesh by Crakyamuni
23 Dec 2005, 9:31 AM
"can you not see the death below us" seemed out of place, Crack Your Money
on A List of Names Worth Listing by SupremeDreamer
6 Aug 2008, 11:13 PM
i got no mention. :( why am i even here? i don't know
on GOD'S MOST WONDERFUL CREATION by iowajerms
7 Aug 2008, 12:33 PM
YOUR NEXT POEM SHOULD BE ABOUT CAPS LOCK
change dull to dim and we'll talk.
change dull to dim and we'll talk.
on Social Studies is for MORANS!! by T. Jonathron Remp
7 Aug 2008, 3:37 PM
Unfortunately, I tried your poetry and not even sea salt helped it's extreme blandness.
Do you plan on being a horrible rapper when you grow up?
Do you plan on being a horrible rapper when you grow up?
on WISHES SHE COULD FORGET and FLOWERS BY THE ROCK by iowajerms
7 Aug 2008, 3:45 PM
Why do you add two poems? Is it because you couldn't wait to hear how awful your stuff is?
"oh but, you know, they're both talking about the same thing. it's really-"
FUCK. OKAY.
Well just fix the last two rhymes in the first poem. Too much... force. Didn't flow well at all compared to the rest.
The second poem, I find not horrible.
How do you expect to rate this? I'm actually gonna rate this and you put me a predicament. thanks.
"oh but, you know, they're both talking about the same thing. it's really-"
FUCK. OKAY.
Well just fix the last two rhymes in the first poem. Too much... force. Didn't flow well at all compared to the rest.
The second poem, I find not horrible.
How do you expect to rate this? I'm actually gonna rate this and you put me a predicament. thanks.
on brain cookies by nentwined
26 Feb 2009, 9:43 PM
i lol'd
on for the slaves and the seekers by Bill Z Bub
1 Mar 2009, 11:13 PM
lol
on prove me wrong by nentwined
6 Mar 2009, 4:18 AM
I liked the title, "Prove Me Wrong" lol
I'd love to prove you wrong. One of these days. I'll come back and be all like... well, we'll see. ;)
Actually: I've never had certainty much. And innocence to the world went gone after a few months ago. hm...
I like how it's a list. And every last line goes together. :)
I'd love to prove you wrong. One of these days. I'll come back and be all like... well, we'll see. ;)
Actually: I've never had certainty much. And innocence to the world went gone after a few months ago. hm...
I like how it's a list. And every last line goes together. :)
on Redemption on the mat. by SupremeDreamer
6 Mar 2009, 8:07 PM
enjoyed the story.
on My Thoughts by amanda_dcosta
9 Mar 2009, 4:46 AM
you either know or you don't know.