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Close To The Beginning (Sonnet) by RawPunkGirl
I waited months to get close to your face
Hoping that night that my fream would be exposed
Being dressed in my best, clothing and lace
Twas my love for you not newly composed
Friends that surround us that new cool night
Both of us watched as they lost all senses
No matter what was to come, I would fight
All of the high feelings, we had less tenses
Our dark alleyway bought us together
I let you see how much my feelings meant
Before departing it all got better
Your heat onto mine is what you had lent
I thought it would last further than it did
But you broke my heart and I ran and hid.
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Arithmetic Mean: 4.3333335
Weighted score: 4.9205313
Overall Rank: 9454
Posted: November 13, 2005 8:58 AM PST; Last modified: November 13, 2005 8:58 AM PST
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Comments:
174 view(s)
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And i'm not even a stalker.
On another note:
Line 3: I think that 'Being dressed in my best...' should be changed. Keep the idea, but change the wording so it doesn't rhyme. Because it sounds horrible.
overall, though, I thought it was ok.