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Abba (Free verse) by oneglove
A father's gift Though trinket defined Is untold wealth To the child it finds And words so small Not understood Withstand the beat of time Moments spent And kind words spoken One day define the man I'll grow big and strong And learn to love Me and daddy, hand in hand
Up the ladder: Blue
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Arithmetic Mean: 5.0
Weighted score: 5.0
Overall Rank: 7970
Posted: November 13, 2005 10:35 AM PST; Last modified: November 13, 2005 10:35 AM PST
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Comments:
[n/a] Blindpoetry @ 70.172.225.193 | 13-Nov-05/3:08 PM | Reply
Line 6: 'Withstand the beat of time' seemed out of place to me...
Could you explain how this ends the first stanza?
[n/a] oneglove @ 24.171.9.144 > Blindpoetry | 13-Nov-05/11:24 PM | Reply
words of advice that dont make sense at the time can stay with us until years later when it finally becomes clear and can help guide us. i felt like there needed to be a break somewhere in the poem and that felt like the best place.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.101.159 | 13-Nov-05/9:12 PM | Reply
Nice stuff.
[8] zodiac @ 217.144.7.195 | 14-Nov-05/3:53 AM | Reply
As if you needed proof of God's existence, the first initials of the band members in ABBA (Abagail, Brian, Bjorn, and Agatha) actually spell ABBA.
[n/a] oneglove @ 24.171.9.144 > zodiac | 14-Nov-05/7:45 AM | Reply
point taken
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