Re: Birth, school, work and death. by darby pyn |
15-Jul-05/8:22 PM |
The ending lines were like rapid fire- but climatically worthy. Were you disregarding where the line breaks fell? It seems like this would be more poignant if one didn't have to scroll around to read the lines, and if the line breaks were placed strategically.
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Re: When the World Forgets by TLRufener |
15-Jul-05/8:17 PM |
I agree with jessicazee, you talked about a kind of pain, but I couldn't really empathize- even though I imagine it is real, in some respect, for you/your narrator.
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Re: Only I wish I could say.. by PunkyPanda |
15-Jul-05/8:14 PM |
I didn't see the happy ending coming.
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Re: Why I Bother by empire942 |
15-Jul-05/8:11 PM |
I stay awake at night thinking about whey too, when I am not thinking of bulgar or tempeh or grape tomatoes or heartbreak.
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Re: Moving Up by jessicazee |
15-Jul-05/8:01 PM |
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Re: Inoculation by bamf909 |
15-Jul-05/7:58 PM |
funny, you should do public health commercials
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Re: Winter Lands: I by http://bandgeek |
7-Dec-03/6:59 PM |
Winter Lands: II
This winter,
a new land to explore,
suburban chickens
peck over frozen ground.
Salt water freezes on bluegreen estuary banksâ
sloping glaze, as inviting as a waterslide
in spite of eternal, internal struggle of salty ice.
Clots of snow form on stilled river
like frothing yeast in lukewarm water.
Gentle spray over the dam freezes
into frosty stalagmites:
upside-down icicles reaching toward clouds.
The traffic on Main Street
comprises of privately owned
pick up trucks with yellow plows attached
on their way to rescue those who can pay.
Shovelers relocate dense snow,
one 12 x 16 x 8 inch rectangle at a time
the satisfying fulfillment of
metal scraping gravel struggles to be heard
over obliviously aimed snowblower motors
who fan their plumes of snow onto
shovelersâ now diminutive accomplishments.
In this land,
it is so easy.
Let the car hide under that mass,
safety is not the certainty
of an accessible city bus every fifteen minutes.
Safety is hibernation behind storm windows
among flannel and housecats,
feeling assured,
there is nothing to do out there anyway.
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Re: museheart is internationally published by scitz |
9-Sep-03/9:42 AM |
It is called "the dozens".
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Re: I Usually Wear Pants by razorgrin |
9-Sep-03/9:39 AM |
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Re: (limits of ambition) by richa |
9-Sep-03/9:34 AM |
Is this a rewrite, seems like I've seen part of it before. Nice job.
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Re: a comment on canto di desiderio by Bill Z Bub |
9-Sep-03/9:22 AM |
Sì, è limitato, ma quello fa parte del divertimento!
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Re: canto di desiderio by Bill Z Bub |
8-Sep-03/8:06 PM |
La parte che ha tradotto correttamente era bella. L'ultima linea avete detto, "Sapete that urlano for you". Elaborereste su questa linea?
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Re: A Lovely Surprise by ?-Dave_Mysterious-? |
7-Sep-03/4:56 PM |
I love the "crisply laid stool" part. They don't make toys like they used to!
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Re: a comment on (untitled) by http://bandgeek |
7-Sep-03/4:50 PM |
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Re: a comment on Babelfish Poetry (I): A pérola (Português) by Geschäftsreise |
7-Sep-03/1:42 PM |
na klar! Ever read DAvid Sedaris' "Me Talk Pretty One Day"?
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Re: My Id and I by William Delacroix |
7-Sep-03/1:34 PM |
Very nice. I liked the simpler sections "My id and I..." contrasted with the more explanatory stanzas, and how the id induced desires lacked punctuation. You could turn this in for a Psychology 101 assignment.
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Re: Babelfish Poetry (III): Segen (Deutsch) by Geschäftsreise |
7-Sep-03/1:22 PM |
Welcher bist du? Reisender? Arbeiter? Denker? Schöpfer, oder alles? Selbstportrait?
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Re: Babelfish Poetry (I): A pérola (Português) by Geschäftsreise |
7-Sep-03/7:19 AM |
Welcher Fremdsprache? Nicht italienisch oder spanisch?
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Re: a comment on (untitled) by http://bandgeek |
7-Sep-03/7:10 AM |
Du bist kein Deutscher, Freund. Keine "Infidelity" von diese Sprache. "Infidelity" ist Ehebruch. Aber, deine Nummern sagen "vergelten", und Ehebrecher.
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Re: Babelfish Poetry (II): Rendu plus Doux (Français) by Geschäftsreise |
7-Sep-03/6:45 AM |
beau, dans cela a maladroitement traduit la manière.
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