on Hey by impert&ent
16 Oct 2017, 1:31 PM
See me.
on A spectacular poem by a handsome man by <{Baba^Yaga}>
16 Oct 2017, 2:07 PM
You had me at "coalishly pinched twin sink holes."
on some deleted poem
6 Jul 2005, 10:09 AM
Great poem.
on some deleted poem
11 Jul 2005, 7:46 PM
This is crap.
on some deleted poem
29 Jun 2005, 7:33 PM
Vivid!
on Crack baby by Caducus
6 Jul 2005, 10:04 AM
Fix line 2 and this is a 10.
on The And women by INTRANSIT
6 Jul 2005, 8:42 AM
"plying a fiddle."
Interesting poem.
Interesting poem.
on Because to Live I Must by TLRufener
6 Jul 2005, 8:49 AM
All the words melt together in an unappealing stew of a novice Witchâs brew.
on Mother Earth by TLRufener
6 Jul 2005, 9:03 AM
Your poem leaves me with the sense that Mother Earth has no love for winter and that in fact sheâs dead throughout the entire season. Is that what you intended?
This poem could be great. I found it too simple. Perhaps if you gave us more a sense of its Magic.
How does this place feel? We know the wind is always calm but how does it look? How does it smell? How is it lit? What time of day are we seeing it, In moonlight, starlight, sunshine?
The descriptions are flat and matter of fact and because of this, the poem loses its Magic.
Iâd love to see this reworked. Paint it more vivid. Take us somewhere enchanted!
How does this place feel? We know the wind is always calm but how does it look? How does it smell? How is it lit? What time of day are we seeing it, In moonlight, starlight, sunshine?
The descriptions are flat and matter of fact and because of this, the poem loses its Magic.
Iâd love to see this reworked. Paint it more vivid. Take us somewhere enchanted!
on some deleted poem
6 Jul 2005, 10:00 AM
Change the title to âDeath Danceâ and change the last word to dip.
on Butterfly Plague by zodiac
8 Jul 2005, 8:49 AM
"Here's a naked-necked girl laughing
in a square, thumbnail sawing an orange-skin.
How grey and soft-bodied, these! "
Vivid image. I can smell the tang.
in a square, thumbnail sawing an orange-skin.
How grey and soft-bodied, these! "
Vivid image. I can smell the tang.
on Zin/Enough/Things/Squeeze/Flow by gregsamsa222
8 Jul 2005, 10:47 AM
Itâs strange but I feel guilty. The kind of guilt one might feel after reading someoneâs diary.
This work is so personal, so strong. It should be rolled up and tied up with the small red string that she left for you in that box. Thereâs more to say but I canât.
Thank You.
This work is so personal, so strong. It should be rolled up and tied up with the small red string that she left for you in that box. Thereâs more to say but I canât.
Thank You.
on Cupid promised me, Nadine by Shardik
16 Oct 2017, 2:22 PM
I give the comments a 7! Bravo!
on Victoria Applesmack and the Easy to Clean Wonder-Spleen by T. Jonathron Remp
17 Oct 2017, 2:58 PM
Tardigrades need friends too!
on Skellington Bakery by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
8 Aug 2006, 7:55 PM
You DO Love me! You really DO Love me! *swoon*
on The Ballad of Fraser Allonby Q.C., Barrister-At-Law by wFraser Allonby Q.C.w
16 Oct 2017, 2:14 PM
"I wear only the best" could've been better. Yeah, that line sucks. The rest, flows like stuff that flows good.
6
6
on Muslim woman at the office by zodiac
16 Oct 2017, 2:42 PM
Awww shucks, no husks.
The quote from the pool party has no place in the office. 4
The quote from the pool party has no place in the office. 4