on I'm a homicidal kind of guy (spoof of every 'down-home' song you've ever heard) by Yardbird
18 Nov 2002, 6:07 AM
I think N'sync should sing it, then you pet that ppk out and whack em !
Full marks my psychotic prince
Full marks my psychotic prince
on some deleted poem
19 Nov 2002, 2:39 AM
I liked it but thought it was missing something, there was no build up to it.
also pedistal is pedestal , check line 2 for 'and angel' surely its 'an angel',
try and add another stanza.
also pedistal is pedestal , check line 2 for 'and angel' surely its 'an angel',
try and add another stanza.
on yellow verse by daniella
19 Nov 2002, 3:04 AM
At last a limerick !
on My love for another. by cleverdevice
19 Nov 2002, 3:42 AM
Just like I was there, you shouls be proud of this one.
on missing you by Goose
19 Nov 2002, 8:15 AM
i agree with chrisof
on Summer Repose by jdsnyd
19 Nov 2002, 8:17 AM
Nicely Constructed, philosophical, liked the line 'too content in the moment'
on some deleted poem
19 Nov 2002, 8:19 AM
Enjoyable, but without wanting to sound vacuous, what the f*** has this gotta do with M.B
on Sisters in Disquise by confuzdlilgirl
19 Nov 2002, 8:24 AM
pretty good CLG, but check paragraphs 2/4 for errors as it kills the vibe your trying to emanate
on Bastard Of The Bastard by Bachus
19 Nov 2002, 10:07 AM
Filled with vitriol, and talk about a memorable last line.
Can we expect a sequel?
nice job
Can we expect a sequel?
nice job
on When It's All Over by BUFFY0BSESSED
20 Nov 2002, 4:53 AM
No offence intended but it goes on a bit and becomes tedious as you keep making the same point, and the point in which your making is not sold poignantly enough for it to move me.
on The Trail by ThoughtfulSoul
20 Nov 2002, 5:41 AM
is this finished? its not a poem and as a piece of literature its woefully uninspiring.
Keep on writing though, you can do it
Keep on writing though, you can do it
on The Trail by ThoughtfulSoul
20 Nov 2002, 5:41 AM
is this finished? its not a poem and as a piece of literature its woefully uninspiring.
Keep on writing though, you can do it
Keep on writing though, you can do it
on Night-mare by INTRANSIT
21 Nov 2002, 3:25 AM
This isn't as thought provoking and evocative as Dale, though I compare unfairly, I always find your work interesting and this is good but it needs something more. I feel this is a more emotional voyeuristic effort rather than stright from the heart.
It sounds like a middle piece lacking a beginning and an end, you normally set the scene so pictorially and it was only a drag of a cuban rather than the full George Burns. Work on it, give it more oooomphhh. ( vote holded for moment )
It sounds like a middle piece lacking a beginning and an end, you normally set the scene so pictorially and it was only a drag of a cuban rather than the full George Burns. Work on it, give it more oooomphhh. ( vote holded for moment )
on some deleted poem
21 Nov 2002, 10:42 AM
Lucio Fulci that Godfather of Gore would be proud you wrote of that scene. To see what dark angels on about there is a clip on this website www.badmovie.org.
Have to ten this, and Dark if we bury the hatchet over our previous bitchy argument you can bury it in my face ( As in the scene from friday 13th part 5)
Have to ten this, and Dark if we bury the hatchet over our previous bitchy argument you can bury it in my face ( As in the scene from friday 13th part 5)
on it was red by kiki
21 Nov 2002, 10:48 AM
Can't believe this has had shit votes, the voting on here is dody at times to say the least, well kiki your not talking bollocks, this is a deep river and i enjoyed the swim. faaaaaaacking 5 ?
have an 8
have an 8
on Goodbye by Nicholas Jones
22 Nov 2002, 3:15 AM
As my surnames 'owen' I had to support the welsh half of me. You possess a lot of talent Mr Jones, you illustrate literature in to clarity with your style.
Maybe our paths will cross again, I would value your opinions/critique on my work.
Are you a wales fan? their playing better than England at the moment at soccer
Maybe our paths will cross again, I would value your opinions/critique on my work.
Are you a wales fan? their playing better than England at the moment at soccer
on Goodbye by Nicholas Jones
22 Nov 2002, 3:23 AM
fix your 1st line 'must' ok?
on The Autopsy (as shown on Channel Four) by Nicholas Jones
22 Nov 2002, 3:56 AM
trouble is the buckets full of organs. You should be educating yourself on late night channel 5 B movies, you'd see plenty of 'buckets' on that (all botox and no brains)
They all thought it was very very beautiful, you should know its very inspiring, thanks for sharing it, its brilliant