Re: a comment on Your word's hurt, only you. by horus8	21-Feb-03/3:19 PM
Yes...yes, I was once launched off an handle. It was in the autumn of 19--, and Colonel Beeflington and I had just built the most fantastical contraption of the century - the Begreasing Tube. It was a glorious machine; each of its harvesters had its own cooling funnel, and enslaved dwarves toiled day and night to maintain its rotational capacitance! It was during the trial run that Beeflington accidentally spilled some very important fluid on the Jeffries Holster. In my panic I attempted to dive into the Holster and rescue it, but I miscalculated and landed on the primary graviton handle!!!!1 As for what happened next, I shan't bore you with the details, but suffice it to say that Captain Undergarment's wife was sent to bed for a week with acute cheek lacerations! In conclusion, I suggest you clamber back onto the handle at once.
Re: a comment on Your word's hurt, only you. by horus8	21-Feb-03/9:53 AM
P.S. It's a myth that lemmings jump off cliffs.
Re: a comment on Your word's hurt, only you. by horus8	21-Feb-03/9:52 AM
Don't fly off the handle or anything.
Re: Your word's hurt, only you. by horus8	21-Feb-03/7:02 AM
Do shut up.
Re: a comment on THE WHEELCHAIR by Garrett S Sexton	20-Feb-03/2:24 PM
I hate you now.
Re: THE WHEELCHAIR by Garrett S Sexton	20-Feb-03/12:09 PM
Here's an interesting question for you, Garrett S Sexton: Do disableds have feelings? Or are they just soulless slabs of jellied meat with wheels attached?
Re: rememberance of things past by keatsImnot	19-Feb-03/3:40 PM
Interesting that you decided to write about a remembrance of things past. Most people just ignore temporal limitations and dive straight into remembrances of future things. I'm jolly glad you made that clear in the title though, because otherwise I might have been rather confused. I can still remember the last time was rather confused. It was a week next Tuesday, and I had tried to blow my nose with a boiled egg. P.S I'm afraid you have forgotten to remember the spelling of remembrance.
Re: a comment on The Gentleman by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.	19-Feb-03/10:52 AM
My real name is Sherlock Tughampton, I'm twelve years old, and I want to be an astronaut. I'm a very special young man because I am in a Wheeled-chair. I don't think there's anything wrong with that - disableds can do anything they want provided they keep an open mind and embrace new challenges with blind enthusiasm and a spare pair of trousers should any unpleasantness occur. And there are ramps everywhere, these days. Sometimes I just don't know what this world is coming to. Disabled access is taking over like a bubonic plague of incoherent gibberish and uncontrollable streams of dribble. I blame T.V.
Re: a comment on The Kansas City Chiefs suck by Jeremi B. Handrinos	17-Feb-03/2:49 PM
Really? I wonder what "James Wright" would have to say about that. I hear you two are becoming rather intimate.
Re: The wheelchair by INTRANSIT	17-Feb-03/2:45 PM
Good Christ! You don't think the "Wheeled-chair" was haunted, do you!?
Re: a comment on SHADOWS OF DARKNESS by TanHand	17-Feb-03/5:37 AM
King Diamond wouldn't wipe his bum with this poeme. HE'D USE IT FOR LYRICS IN HIS NEXT EPIC CONCEPT ALBUM LOL
Re: Small Teeth in a Glass Bowl by Fear of Garbage	17-Feb-03/5:36 AM
This is quite good, I suppose.
Re: Atonement by aperfecttool77	17-Feb-03/5:35 AM
Do shut up.
Re: The Poet by muffin	17-Feb-03/4:55 AM
Try writing on the Turin Shroud instead of paper! It can be a great way to cure writer's block! Also crapper's block!
Re: Brainy Smurf by Bachus	17-Feb-03/4:53 AM
I suppose "James Wright" has been telling you about asswagons. Then beware, for he knows not of what he speaks.
Re: a comment on Sharks For Libido by scitz	16-Feb-03/5:35 PM
According to dictionary.com you're gay.
Re: a comment on Johannesburg 2002 by Blue Magpie	15-Feb-03/4:45 PM
Someone just excitedly shrieked "Go on my son, go on!" and clapped twice outside my window.
Re: a comment on Johannesburg 2002 by Blue Magpie	15-Feb-03/4:45 PM
None of those sentences make any sense.
Re: To My Doubters/Doubt Me by marvelis	15-Feb-03/4:37 PM
How do you achieve the world?
Re: Johannesburg 2002 by Blue Magpie	15-Feb-03/4:22 PM
I hate to say this Jeremi, but I think that the opinions of both yourself and Sam Kinneson are simultaneously unbelievably wrong and unbelievably arrogant. Your embarrassing ignorance concerning the AIDS virus was amply demonstrated to us all when you insisted that the word "AIDS" was synonymous with the word "gay". At first glance, this might seem like a perfectly reasonable statement to make, especially in light of recent events in the US of A; but on closer inspection, your naughtiness is made only too clear: "AIDS" is not a word. It is an acronym. When will people learn that it is careless acronymity, not careless promiscuity, that lies at the root of the AIDS problem? How long do we, the British public, have to sit by and watch as thousands of innocent bystanders are carelessly infected with these deadly acronyms before someone gets off their fat bum and actually does something about it? Too long, I say! So, for the love of sweet merciful Christ, please give just two pounds a month, or whatever you can afford, to: Careless Acronyms Can Kill (C.A.C.K), 24 Bishop's Wagon, Chauncery Hostel Lane, Cambridge. Thank you.