Re: Loosed by <~>	18-Oct-02/7:56 AM
Yes, the target image in the first stanza - of course that links back to 'Bowed'.
Re: Loosed by <~>	18-Oct-02/7:54 AM
'brothers and lovers'? You have been paying close heed to Mrs G's work, I think. I wonder if the second stanza needs some more clarification? I'm not quite sure of how the inter-relationships work.
Re: Anti-Kinetic by anonymous	18-Oct-02/7:48 AM
There's a hint of Yoda in the final 5 or 6 lines - are you a Jedi?
Re: a comment on Bowed by <~>	18-Oct-02/7:41 AM
I've just been checking out Rex Karrs, one of your friends I think? He's good. You've introduced a few good people here (Knickytoy I think is ace) - how do you know all these poets, whereas I know none? I must hang out in the wrong places.
Re: Bobbing for Apples by Rex Karrs	18-Oct-02/7:37 AM
Will he be biting into her? An unexpectedly visceral undertone, which I like. I also like the details about the bookworms and the honour students.
Re: Hunter's Moon by Rex Karrs	18-Oct-02/7:34 AM
Captivating. The hunter's impotence is so beautifully drawn and held back for the end. 'Shellac of frost' - very good.
Re: Bowed by <~>	18-Oct-02/7:23 AM
The tensions behind this are so powerful. For those who cannot speak, the written word is such an erotic tool. This balances up fear and anticipation, secrecy and disclosure. Woof. Did you get the link for Scriberazone?
Re: When Your Best Friend Says You Drink Too Much by jessicazee	18-Oct-02/7:20 AM
This is full of really great imagery - your visual imagination is full of marvels - but the poem as a whole doesn't hang together for me. Perhaps you should try tighter structures? This is almost too allusive, to the point of incoherence. But your eyes and ears are finely tuned...
Re: a comment on Dying for a Dowry by Blue Magpie	18-Oct-02/6:49 AM
The interesting paradox is that when the British banned suttee, they were performing a civilised act (amongst lots of admittedly uncivilised acts) but the Indian culture clung onto it almost as a way of raising to fingers to Imperial rule. But I think most rational people are with the English on this particular question. So where does this leave us in the morally relatvistic world? Is there basic morality, or do we let cultures get on with their own lives? Which leads us to the Arab world and America...
Re: First Kiss... by loneshadow29	18-Oct-02/6:30 AM
I don't think you should lean back on the phrase 'indescribable emotion' - it's the poet's job to describe it, otherwise how can the reader feel it?
Re: purple and black gangstaz theme tune by rosiebailey	18-Oct-02/6:26 AM
Something tells me that these are not the hardest bunch ever - where are you from, Chalfont St Giles?. A Morris Minor? Recasting Margaret Thatcher as an ace rapper is cool.
Re: The ballad of woosie by rosiebailey	18-Oct-02/6:17 AM
You've forced me to revisit a horrible childhood nightmare - little orange singing men. Yikes.
Re: You Can by Dariana	18-Oct-02/6:14 AM
Also, it just isn't true. bad stuff happens, then you die. That's it. Oh, apart from the good stuff. But it's out of your control, don't fool yourself.
Re: the girl what gave scott the look by UAFANTHORPEY	18-Oct-02/6:12 AM
Your mate Scott is an idiot.
Re: Ode to Larkbeat Twoshoes by Nicholas Jones	18-Oct-02/6:09 AM
I liek the reminiscence and the ending of the poem, but i don't know about the beginning - maybe it seems a bit wordy, and I don't quite see the connection between Vick and you becoming a 'person you can love'. The conversational tone of the rest of it is ace though. And Larkbeat Twoshoes is a fantastic name.
Re: Stamp by worldsofwar	18-Oct-02/1:55 AM
'generally a cheap tramp'?
Re: Bleeding V2 by INTRANSIT	18-Oct-02/1:54 AM
I like the fact that you follow the fishing metaphor all the way through now, and I like the approaching menace of the bears at the end.
Re: a comment on On the Swings by Christof	18-Oct-02/1:52 AM
Yep, best place for them.
Re: a comment on On the Swings by Christof	18-Oct-02/1:48 AM
Neither had I until I saw this particularly nauseating couple in the park the other day. All that laughing and giggling and big eyes and yuck. Am I a curmudgeon? very probably.
Re: a comment on Bleeding V2 by INTRANSIT	17-Oct-02/8:17 AM
Fair enough. But she's quite cute.