Re: a comment on Hunt by cobalt	21-Oct-02/7:34 AM
Well, nothing. It was just an allusion that the last line pushed in my head. Seemed to kind of sexualise the whole thing,as if the hunt were a metaphor for something else. But that might be me and my predilection for hanging around in reed beds. I've said it before, I can always be relied upon for aberrant readings.
Re: Hunt by cobalt	21-Oct-02/7:28 AM
'awaits the fall' is good - it makes me think if fall of man, as if something less than innocent is going on which he is too blind to see.
Re: nothing could by nentwined	21-Oct-02/6:20 AM
Cunningly funny
Re: d e e p e r by daniella	21-Oct-02/6:10 AM
I've just realised I forgot to vote on this - sorry! Here you are...
Re: a comment on One liners for the ladies by INTRANSIT	21-Oct-02/6:08 AM
I think it is you who are the racist, you for whom the phrase 'ethnic monorities' is a TABOO and HATEFUL.
Re: a comment on One liners for the ladies by INTRANSIT	21-Oct-02/6:07 AM
But why not? Wouldn't that be a way of saying that he sees his love in the faces of all nations? Wouldn't be, ahem, 'beautiful'?
Re: Faith by INTRANSIT	21-Oct-02/6:05 AM
Yep I think that's better - you're no longer talking down to the fire but you are urging it on its ambition.
Re: a comment on d e e p e r by daniella	21-Oct-02/6:04 AM
I bet they didn't think they would. It's amazing how they have burrowed into the consciousness. To be so simple and ambitious at the same time, and to bring it off...
Re: a comment on Sniper by nightii	21-Oct-02/6:01 AM
Suddenly I'm very glad not to be in Washington DC. Or Maryland. Or Virginia. May Chief Moose (who has the best cop's name ever) be successful soon.
Re: Faith by INTRANSIT	21-Oct-02/4:28 AM
Something of the Prometheus myth about this - I might cut out the 'Silly fire' line and try to compress the last four lines into another three line stanza, but that's just me, I like regular forms. Your central idea is good.
Re: One liners for the ladies by INTRANSIT	21-Oct-02/4:25 AM
I especially like the middle stanza - this is very generous hearted.
Re: a comment on On the Swings by Christof	21-Oct-02/4:24 AM
Thanks! It's on Thursday. I shall start to wave goodbye to my twenties. The thirties are supposed to be good, or so people say.
Re: oedipus is raising a pint to me now by <~>	21-Oct-02/1:29 AM
This is very sly, zin.
Re: a comment on Belongings by Christof	21-Oct-02/1:27 AM
Too damn right. I won't be making that mistake again.
Re: a comment on Do Swans Get Jealous? (#2) by Christof	21-Oct-02/1:26 AM
St James's, but close enough... you know London?
Re: a comment on On the Swings by Christof	18-Oct-02/8:49 AM
OK, good, that's how it reads.
Re: a comment on On the Swings by Christof	18-Oct-02/8:46 AM
Thanks for voting. Does this criticism seem fair?
Re: a comment on On the Swings by Christof	18-Oct-02/8:45 AM
I think really it was a lack of clarity - in trying to capture the derangement of the narrator, the poem itsef became confusing. The usage of 'Sole' is very unusual, the word isn't usually used as a noun unless you're talking about the soles of the feet, which I think put some people off, and the red nose is a comic image and it was hard to be sure if you intended it to be so. It's not a lost cause at all, though - it just comes across as being a bit weird. That can be a good thing, though.
Re: a comment on On the Swings by Christof	18-Oct-02/8:37 AM
Thanks Vulcan, who would you fling off the end of the swing?
Re: a comment on Loosed by <~>	18-Oct-02/8:05 AM
This was it: 'OK, now I see that she on the perch is Juliet - it was the girl who was confusing me. I think it's the perch. If you made it a balcony, perhaps I'd have got it quicker. Although the 'What's in a name' quote is pretty much a giveaway, now I look at it. Ugh, Friday afternoon, I'm not at my quickest. '