Re: An Ode to Anal Joy by wFraser Allonby Q.C.w	27-May-03/9:13 AM
'Smuggerly'- very good
Re: Beam reach by INTRANSIT	9-Jun-03/7:49 AM
Very graceful (though watch spelling - 'futres'). Lovely alliteration of t and l in the middle stanza, you realy feel the tension and equilibrium there.
regarding some deleted poem...	9-Jun-03/7:54 AM
Writing is a constant process of taking the knocks, absorbing them and moving on - even if the knocks are unjust, unexplained or just plain spiteful. Of course, constructive criticism is useful, while abuse isn't at all. But the worst thing you can do is turn it in on yourself and worry at it. I have more 0s than I care to think about, but I only look at the 10s!
Re: The Order Of Things by Mr Pig	9-Jun-03/8:02 AM
Olve the atmospher, the old farmer and all... I think it's possibly a little too preciously descriptive for my tastes, especially the clouds, but I'm an curmudgeonly old puritan about things like adverbs and adjectives. The casual cruelty of the farmer is very Heathcliffian in a bathetic kind of way. A nice touch.
Re: The Gecko, and the Italian book collector by horus8	19-Jun-03/5:45 AM
So you're purposely keeping me out of the top 15, huh? Well that's just typical. But hey, I don't begrudge it, not after the things you wrote on my poems the other day. I also like geckos, so keep your place in the top 15 and good luck and thank you.
regarding some deleted poem...	26-Jun-03/6:39 AM
My, it's been a long time Mrs God - I really like this, especially the 'ass-hat' and the conspiratorial feeling at the end.
Re: i gotta sign by helpfulpoems	2-Jul-03/7:10 AM
Thank you and good night
Re: I'll be your Gimp by GAY AS FU*K	2-Jul-03/7:12 AM
Ian Curtis was maried. was he gay as well? I didn't know that. No wonder he felt a bit confused about things. maybe he was a chocolate pimp. He would'bve hated Erasure though, would probably have been more of a Pet Shop Boy.
regarding some deleted poem...	11-Jul-03/6:59 AM
I take it English isn't your first language?
Re: A Brand New Eye by EAger to Offend	14-Jul-03/9:17 AM
I like the last stanza -'mundane hours by the bushel' is great - this is unusually abstract and philosophical (but given stanza 2 maybe that's the point) - very interesting Thank you for your comments on my poems. You're very kind and I'm glad you liked them 'cos they were the last flwoering of a creative spurt that's dried up a bit - I'm hoping more will come. If some damn fool publisher ever decides to make a book of mine, I'll send you a copy. Don't hold your breath though...
Re: Acoustic by zzinnia66	15-Jul-03/6:13 AM
Guitar technicalities made poetry - I like it. Perfectly condensed.
Re: Igor's inspiration by zzinnia66	15-Jul-03/6:15 AM
I have to say, without the background info I was a bit baffled, but the last line rocks - a reference to their seemingly impossible flight?
regarding some deleted poem...	16-Jul-03/8:08 AM
As for the poem, it's misspelled and ungrammatical.
Re: Windmill by the Sea by Jeremi B. Handrinos	16-Jul-03/8:09 AM
Yep, I'd like to hear the music to this.
Re: Pretzel by daryash-koh	17-Jul-03/4:23 AM
I like this, but I don't understand why it's called Pretzel. Nevertheless... I think a bit of bile is good, dactylic or otherwise
Re: beyond sences by calilegzzz	17-Jul-03/7:48 AM
This is very Yoda-like. I don't think I believe I word of it.
Re: Paean by Terence	17-Jul-03/7:49 AM
'she is my pearl' maybe? Otherwise it soudns like the Lord is your pearl, given the uncertainties between 2nd and 3rd person
Re: Yellow Star by Mr Pig	22-Jul-03/4:49 AM
I have some sympathy with Horus's point. It seems that the struggle in the Middle East at the moment is the result of the Jewish people having single-mindedly failed to learn from their own history of the last 50-60 years. Yes the Holocaust was an absolutely foul, vile, depraved event in history - and let's not imagine that the Germans were alone in their views, there were plenty of proto-Nazis in Britain, France, Italy, Spain (and the US - the KKK) who also had blood on their hands. However, I think the point of history is not to labour one event, one people's history, for the purpose of eliciting merely pity or horror (or, for that matter, Academy Awards). The point is to learn from it, to move on, to try to make the world progress in some way. Both Horus and Mr Pig have talked with some pride of their backgrounds, have distinguished different strains of identity, different ethnic groups. Everybody needs to know where they come from, but an obsessive attention to ethnic detail, to the rights and wrongs of past members of particular groups generations ago, is where all the trouble starts. What does it matter if your great-great-grandfather was a black Scotsman from Wales? It matters because it affects how you live now, how you understand the world; it should not be used as some kind of badge of honour. I think a person deserves special treatment not because of who their parents were, but because of what they do with their lives. Racial division is the biggest problem the human race faces, because it threatens to destroy us. A small historical fact to add to the German/Jew argument - a lot of right-wing aggression towards the Jews was centred around a book called 'The Protocols of the Zionist Elders', which purported to have been produced by rabbis and leading Jews and which spoke of a conspiracy to take over the world. It was a forgery produced by European anti-Semites in the late 19th century. I don't think Hitler's rise to power is quite so easily explicable by the ambitions of the Jews. Anti-Semitism has a far longer and ignobler history than that, and you have to remember that Germany had been shafted in the Treay of Versailles by the very unJewish (and also fairly anti-Semitic in places) British, US and French governments.
regarding some deleted poem...	31-Jul-03/6:41 AM
And isn't making a broad generalisation about all white people being full of hate and prejudice in itself somewhat prejudicial? I know 'racist' is a term loaded towards white perceptions of black people, but it does cut both ways. How dare you assume that, because I am white, I hate all other ethnic groups? Stop beig so much of a victim. Cut up your credit cards, learn to speak Spanish, whatever. The strange thing about your poem is that it can be taken as a satire of American values except for 'The white man hates...', where you step talking about 'we' and start talking about 'they'. You shouldn't mix your perspectives like this, it clouds your message.
Re: Oxywarmonger by poetandknowit	1-Aug-03/2:16 AM
Please don't take this the wrong way when I say that the comments on this poem are as entertaining as the poem itself. Not only did you spark off deabte, you instituted a whole war. No wonder your poem's so paranoid. For me, the satire is a bit too broad, and bit too much of a blunderbuss. I prefer something a little sharper and subtler (but fuck it's hard to do, I've tried myself and never done it). This pokes fun at something that deserves tit, though. I like it when I look in (very occasionally now) and find something startling from an old hand.