Have you read any Octavio Paz? The line 'new beginnings remind me that my future lies in my past' struck a chord for me. But I would suggest you need to place more emphasis on rhythm, even if it doesn't rhyme it could be better if it flowed more smoothly.

I don't think you should put 'stupid planet' in the last stanza. I couldn't come to terms with the underlying meaning here until I read that; the significance of the rock was intriguing, but the tell-tale speech marks feel like a cop out to me. I like the way you personify the 'rock'.

hehe..10

I like the way you address such contemporary themes here, its refreshing and intriguing, especially considering how many consider rap and hip-hop to be the most relevant form of poetry in today's world. However, I'm inclined to agree with Shuushin that you lose your momentum towards the end, as it feels like something of an anticlimax. 8

That is pretty damn sweet, I gotta say. Enjoy the emotion, my friend - enjoy the emotion. couple spellings for you if you like: "wasen't" s/b "wasn't", "haden't", "hadn't" - except, as you may know - the misspellings add to the effect of the poem. Good luck.

I like these - I'm not keen on the god theme (and I noticed you capitalized it here, and not on the last one) and I think it would be fine without it - but hey - it's your thang. Carry on.

This is pretty not bad. 9.49

title: "Prima donna." I'd give that a 9.

Hmmmm, this has potential, but unfortunately I detect more than a faint whiff of plagiarism in the air. Are you an oasis fan by any chance? The bridge is oddly reminiscent of another song...

It definitely has a lyrical quality to it, I could imagine it being sung rather than recited. Not too sure about the flow though, there are times when it seems overburdened by the choice of language and this stifles the rythm a little.

I, too, know nothing of the rap scene. But you've shown it to me here and it makes sense. I'll listen closer next time I hear it.

The first verse flows well. The rest seems unrelated, redundant even, supposition. I'd rather see snow flakes than "would be" flakes.

Wish I were schizophrenic. Sounds like fun. Seem better, though, to make it personal, not pitting it inside their heads, but talk about how it is inside the head of a schizophrenic.

its okay......but it sort of reminds me of a mediocre version of e.e.cummings.... -mega

i really like your writing ~are you published?~ <if not you should be> -mega

i like this....... -mega

~beautiful~ -megan

"Revivifying " don't see that one much. Consisten rhyming scheme, with a change on the refrain. Kasturi is Indian, no? You might want to trim some prepositions, maybe? Why do I harp on that so?

You're gonna haveta help me with this one I think. I'm trying at least - ozone layer destruction? It is a very nice start to something - but I think I need, or most people will need, more to get involved.

jesus christ, crystal. This is almost a pome! What's gotten into you? First stanza intrigued me. Last two lines are good too, and "broken roses"