Re: The Man Who Drooped by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.	26-Jun-08/8:51 PM
classic.
Re: Falling Away by Holy Sinner	27-Jun-08/6:55 PM
it's -> its two-by-fours (I think) ... typical drifting away poem. some nice imagery--the poem could benefit by focusing on that and making it more coherent.
Re: The folded ways your eyes cave by Shardik	27-Jun-08/7:22 PM
Villanelles have definitely made me feel this way. Firefox doesn't know what a villanelle is. But it doesn't know what Firefox is, either, unless I capitalize it. I feel ... guided. 6 for fun.
Re: Why I want to kill Opie by Bachus	27-Jun-08/7:23 PM
meh.
Re: The Fog And The Androids by Shardik	27-Jun-08/7:24 PM
definitely lyric; and kind of fun. but not really interesting. I can imagine this set to music, though, and people singing along.
Re: If you pimp me I'll stay Walter by Shardik	27-Jun-08/7:25 PM
ex-fix-i-ate pwnage. oh, shardik.
Re: The Lion and the worm. by <{Baba^Yaga}>	27-Jun-08/7:28 PM
... strange. yes, strange.
Re: Da Ghetto by <{Baba^Yaga}>	27-Jun-08/7:29 PM
ouch.
Re: FOR YOU!! by kristie24	2-Jul-08/2:33 AM
definitely one for the pimple archives. rhymes/spelling/content ... hurt ...
Re: Under a better bed wetter by Shardik	2-Jul-08/2:35 AM
hilarious, but doesn't really do it for me as a poem. goes on a bit much, and while you get kudos on "lugubriously", ... eh. thanks for the cheer anyway :) I know you weren't going for "quality", but there's room for art in it anyway. Though one man's art is another's bed wetting, sure...
Re: There can be only one by Shardik	2-Jul-08/2:36 AM
definitely has something (situational plot). If you could inject a little more context and a little less highlander...
Re: We can all be free with our legs by daggatolar	2-Jul-08/2:37 AM
strange. but I still don't know if I want you to go around with your legs open. what happened to good old crawling around with nothing but your arms as motive force?
Re: The United Face of Totally Grody by Shardik	2-Jul-08/2:38 AM
ow. I couldn't read it. great job of "what the hell".
Re: Purple Reign of Blood by Kamikaze	2-Jul-08/2:40 AM
definitely something many folks have envisioned with glee. the rhymes are blatantly forced (with pseudo-poetic grammatical restructuring and all that goodness) ... good for a quick chuckle?
Re: Words by Celticai	14-Oct-08/7:09 PM
There's a lot here, some I'd like to see plumbed more deeply, some could well be spun off into its own ruminations ((striving to capture the correct word could be a novel, I think; then, I didn't get enough sleep last night)) The flow feels more like you're trying to find the poem (which is how I tend to write, myself, so maybe I'm reading too much into that). As it stands, I find it too clunky. But lots of promise.
Re: Mountain Fever by Celticai	14-Oct-08/7:12 PM
As someone else wrote on one of your poems--"get out of my head!" Feels very much like something I would have written ten years ago (though I never really went for staircases). That said, I find a lot of your words redundant (and in such a way as to render their compatriots less powerful). And the piece as a whole is missing some novelty, flow, or something to set it apart from a multitude of poems like it. Perhaps you can make it more personal?
Re: panpragmalogoethospathos by malpaso	27-Feb-09/5:52 AM
interesting. there's chunks and cake and nugget here. but kind of disheartening to pick them out of the puke. refine?
Re: My love is drowning in PCP by T. Jonathron Remp	27-Feb-09/5:53 AM
I like "shine spasm". The rest doesn't work so much for me.
Re: no title by Dovina	27-Feb-09/5:54 AM
:heh: I had some trouble with the transition from 1 to 2; and 3 felt somewhat cheap.
Re: Bacchus and the Ivy by <{Baba^Yaga}>	27-Feb-09/5:56 AM
"and why it might"? Has a good lyric sense to it, but it feels like too much nonsense, too. A touch of bob dylan, a touch of the beatles, and other things I recognize but can't name--but I think more it winds up just "touched". Then again, 6am, I might be reading too much or too little... In the end, I enjoyed it, and that's always a plus.