Re: a comment on The Hermit on the Thoroughfare by http://mulberryfairy	11-Jan-06/11:27 AM
i've never seen god. you?
Re: a comment on The Hermit on the Thoroughfare by http://mulberryfairy	11-Jan-06/11:23 AM
exactly. but on a hermit?
Re: The Hermit on the Thoroughfare by http://mulberryfairy	11-Jan-06/11:15 AM
"mortal pelvis" is an odd combo; how can a pelvis be anything but?
Re: Flow by zodiac	11-Jan-06/11:13 AM
i liked it then and i likes it now.
Re: Untitled by http://mulberryfairy	10-Jan-06/9:30 AM
i like the dream litany. i don't understand how the nightmare protects you, though.
Re: The Dark Days of Aristotle by somemorepoetry	10-Jan-06/9:27 AM
please, explain what this means: Where there’s smoke, there’s fire, he said Together with his long name and Cigarette brand. i don't understand why he would say his name and cigarette brand. or am i getting it all wrong?
Re: a comment on She Crab by http://mulberryfairy	10-Jan-06/9:24 AM
could be, but the language confuses me. call me a dolt. this part: "then sees her calm display" who see the calm siplay? the crab, the child?
Re: Pledge by http://mulberryfairy	10-Jan-06/9:19 AM
you made me laugh with this one. and you made me ask myself who i am, damn you.
Re: She Crab by http://mulberryfairy	10-Jan-06/9:14 AM
"She flips suddenly, too soon, the child startles back " the child flips, or the crab flips? I can't tell if the crab is/was alive/dead, and i want to know. clarifying this will clarify all. i agree about the too, too solid flesh; i don't see it as solid at all. that being said, this is a great moment. you dropped us right into it.
Re: light [edited] by lmp	10-Jan-06/9:04 AM
still, it's not a complete image, even if it is a lovely one. the hard-ass in me wants a complete image from my haiku.
Re: After the Storm by somemorepoetry	10-Jan-06/8:58 AM
"And shoved in to rest in the silt from the north Fields grown tired with potatoes." really nice work, here.
Re: Sleep It All Away by somemorepoetry	10-Jan-06/8:55 AM
you say you just need a friend. man, that's the worst place to be, ever. wrap her up in that blanket, why don't you.
Re: Mittens by somemorepoetry	10-Jan-06/8:53 AM
when mittens turn, they fall? the title into the first line misleads me. i know what you are talking about, i just don't like the stretch.
Re: Oh Verrazano by Joe-joe	10-Jan-06/8:35 AM
there are some nice moments here. i especially enjy\oy the metaphor of the steel and iron as her dress. i think that the rhyme you use distractst he reader. since it came first, i looked for the whole thing to have rhythm and rhyme, and was a little disappointed when it didn't hold throughout.
Re: Construction Lot (edit) by zodiac	9-Jan-06/10:58 AM
the wet trash can cross it but you cannot, do not. in my heart twice in S1 does not seem intentional, and maybe should be an edit. drop "just" from S3 L1; it's a filler word. nice linebreak at S3 L2 beautiful ending. love it that mirror sky subtextually tells me about the puddles, the melt in warming March.
Re: Duff firs, Nawal by zodiac	9-Jan-06/10:52 AM
i like it. in english. and i like the way my ill-informed pronunciation makes it sound in arabic.
Re: Uncontrolled scribblings one luch break by Nicholas Jones	9-Jan-06/10:44 AM
no need for apologiy. i question the need for the stanza on footballers. i'm missing the relationship to the seasonality of the rest of it. then again, maybe the january fog has got to me as well.
Re: a comment on Birmingham gardens by INTRANSIT	9-Jan-06/9:52 AM
yeah, that kid's not getting in no matter what. big ups for the buffy-esque name, though.
Re: a comment on Reckoning by <~>	9-Jan-06/9:40 AM
you gotta post in the welcome forum to get let in, rich...
Re: floss every day by digipoet	9-Jan-06/9:21 AM
imagine the follow-your-bliss existence you'd have if you could floss twice? i likes it.