| Re: a comment on in a singular way by daniella |
9-Oct-17/7:33 AM |
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wow. i don't think i've been here in a decade. i hope all is well with you.
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| Re: a comment on Going to Michigan for the weekend by <~> |
6-Mar-09/6:02 AM |
it's been a long time since i've held a shuttle.
and now there's a garden, and hops, lots of hops in michigan, and all else is but a tracing of a memory
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| Re: for sue (20030815) by nentwined |
9-Jul-08/7:47 AM |
ha! thanks for the smile, k
:)
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| Re: a comment on Danse by Limness |
25-Apr-07/6:54 AM |
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| Re: a comment on The Secret by ecargo |
30-Sep-06/10:18 AM |
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well, it is my moniker, and i give you permission to cheat on this one...
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| Re: a comment on The Secret by ecargo |
30-Sep-06/6:36 AM |
ti's a tilde, so you you near rhyme "will do" or something close to that....
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| Re: a comment on Going to Michigan for the weekend by <~> |
30-Sep-06/6:35 AM |
thanks, ranger. i'm not sure if i can make this one work without giving away the context. i'd like to get a few more comments before i reveal it.
a friend pointed out that perhaps this one is just for me, but i'd like to be able to publish it. i knwo it needs a lot of work.
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| Re: Farmhouse, Southern France (storm on arrival) by Ranger |
29-Sep-06/1:41 PM |
i think you go too far, here, ranger. i know you mean 'sunflower" but solar flower reads as solar flare, to me, at first--not that it will read like that to everyone, but 'flare' is a word often quick on the heels of 'solar'.
you've got some nice descriptions here, but the language gets blustery, rather than omminous, whioch is, i think the mood you want to set for this. although, i could be wrong.
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| Re: In the hollow (rough) by ecargo |
29-Sep-06/1:39 PM |
"flashing quick and crosshatched with careless
pricker scrapes;"
oooh. ooh. ooh.
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| Re: a comment on The Secret by ecargo |
29-Sep-06/1:38 PM |
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| Re: Wet dreams by ecargo |
29-Sep-06/1:37 PM |
gorgeous language, e.
'mother bulk' sat well with me. it was the perfect image, for me, to describe the scene.
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| Re: a fresh start by *.*ReAdY To SnAp.*. |
29-Sep-06/1:35 PM |
except, lose the last line.
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| Re: a fresh start by *.*ReAdY To SnAp.*. |
29-Sep-06/1:35 PM |
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the perfect pimple! 10, i say! 10!
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| Re: Colors of Me by MissUnderstood |
29-Sep-06/1:27 PM |
do you know about enjambement? it's a useful poetic device. this is an excellent start, but if you didn't end each line so suddenly, i think you could make this baby work overtime.
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| Re: the secret life of the sundew by pollywolly |
29-Sep-06/1:26 PM |
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| Re: Wyndham by Aetius |
29-Sep-06/1:21 PM |
LOl.
quite a bit of fun, here, ae
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| Re: After Fighting (More Blood Edit) by zodiac |
27-Jan-06/12:14 AM |
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hmmm. it had a lot more power as a prose poem, zodiac. not that it's not good like this...just that there was an urgency in the paragraph that's missing here.
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| Re: Green things by ecargo |
16-Jan-06/9:35 AM |
"none to straddle worlds or shoulder skies."
is a great line.
"We break us like ice;"
is unclear; what do you mean by this?
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| Re: a comment on The nymph steals the farm-son by <~> |
12-Jan-06/1:51 PM |
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| Re: a comment on The Hermit on the Thoroughfare by http://mulberryfairy |
11-Jan-06/11:33 AM |
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