Re: Raining in Dream by memorybabe	25-Dec-02/10:00 PM
well since i'm down with that italian bink, i'll be moving on...to better things and this was nice.
Re: lovely by pink_punk_kisses87	25-Dec-02/10:03 PM
almost there, maybe add another beginning sentence for 'setting' than space, then stanza, sentence close.
Re: The Day the Winter Muse Fighters of the World Came By by <~>	25-Dec-02/10:14 PM
cheers. i can't give it a ten because of the sensitive nature of it 'all', but precise writing.e
regarding some deleted poem...	26-Dec-02/3:00 PM
"ripe cherry ruptures" Lordie, lordie. i just bet.q
Re: your voice soothes me in the dark by rockinindividual	26-Dec-02/3:09 PM
that was fun.??
Re: Oh my gosh what was that? by ==Doylum	26-Dec-02/3:19 PM
your confessional is lacking pyrgates and enbrowning, you have no prawnes...and worst of aLL NO POOP DECK.therefore, you leave me no choice, but to offer you the plank complete with corn and whole peanuts. also we have a plank that comes in wood grain, hangover black and sesame seed. enjoy.r
Re: it sounds like dying but tastes like living. by skaskowski	26-Dec-02/3:25 PM
fucking sheer spoon fed brilliance, and you're right, and i'll probably never be, but you're mine. i love your poetry. i could read it all day every day, and i do. i love you. more than the rocks that i was, or the fences i paint more than the [horse] more than the [sky net] your pen is a neon maniac blue. your stroll a hijack 'platinum' band that fits and squeezes. i'm just a handprint. caved.e
regarding some deleted poem...	26-Dec-02/3:32 PM
ha* ha ***ha ^ha! smart bomb* **you wont understand this being too inclined for scrotum * this is my favorite because i get to chirp ^an aLien shape beant on poopdom and kontrol. *** typo, hurpppppppp. bong toke PPPPhweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewww. urp.a
Re: pragmatic bastard! by skaskowski	26-Dec-02/3:36 PM
close.h
regarding some deleted poem...	27-Dec-02/1:16 PM
The best thing you've ever written. GOLDEN-TIP..
Re: dps 2 - new ver. by decadentlaurel	27-Dec-02/5:28 PM
very romantic and surreal. captivating visuals. a wonderful poem.e
Re: im playing basketball by rockinindividual	27-Dec-02/5:41 PM
this is all second act. no first or third? it needs more arc. set up your anger more, so that we know why you are mad, exactly, and more of the process you took to expose that anger and fear in order to cure it..beyond just the basketball..that's only a third of the solution. where is the other two thirds? good first draft though. here's a seven.
Re: You Win by ritz1605	27-Dec-02/5:45 PM
pervert.n
Re: first words by decadentlaurel	27-Dec-02/5:51 PM
shouldn't this be final thouhts?
Re: cars by mogwai	27-Dec-02/5:53 PM
no circumlocution here. tidy and real.
Re: plain by blackball	28-Dec-02/12:18 PM
sure, i'd love to..'dada', (i don't know if i'm spelling it correctly), is poetry in a artistic shape that works on maby levels within the readers psyche, but i can give you a better example. a poem i wrote called hey, shut up and cut my grass. z wrote one shaped like a penis..but i don't think that dada is even necisarily applicable to this poetic situation, let me do an edit, try this. i was left standing, by myself holding hands with the air, the bleak moon stared down upon me and seeing that i was a solitary figure, stood aside and let me be. I watched slowly as days went by, fluttering past at an alarming rate. my life is going by too, i'm noticing nothing but you, indirect emotion lingering on your breath you didn't know what to say so you didn't say anything.a
Re: plain by blackball	28-Dec-02/12:21 PM
the edit still needs to be cleaned up, but i think you get the point.
Re: Maria by Nicholas Monson	28-Dec-02/3:23 PM
(whom to that) the woman and the whom don't work well off of eachother in the last line. still a pleasant, and stirring poem to say the least.r
Re: Mountain Ash, Mid Glamorgan by Nicholas Jones	28-Dec-02/5:57 PM
beautiful.
Re: Ambiguous Love Poem For A Girl I Once Knew by poetandknowit	28-Dec-02/8:51 PM
one of the ten best poems on this site. hands down. if not, than the best in the subject it deals upon.