| Re: For the boyfriend I don't have by ~incarnate~ |
11-Dec-02/9:37 AM |
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Beautiful, something nice to go home on, i wrote one like this once called 'When I meet my love' there is something very romantic and mystical in pre conception of a paragon like a soul mate, good luck in your search hope you got the patience you'll need it. *8*
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| Re: The rendition 2 (at the wedding) by ~incarnate~ |
11-Dec-02/9:38 AM |
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lord of the ringpiece, frodo is the fudgepacker of dwarves - watch out smurfs
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Dec-02/9:41 AM |
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A poetic snow shaker - made me feel happy of my roots and that makes me a happy metaphor -well done rkf
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| Re: Europeans shouldn't mess with Ronald McDonald because one day he will rule their pathetic "continent" by bondjedi |
11-Dec-02/9:44 AM |
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deep fried chickenhead mcnuggets and slow worms in fish, Macdonalds and snails are the least disgusting, lets have some more happymeal haikus
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Dec-02/9:52 AM |
1st of all hats off to you hatters this is a moody piece and i jive it. Crows have dozens of myths about them, all of which insiduously creepy, I heard that crows wings are lifted by the stolen breaths of the dead and when they die their feathers are not scattered by the 4 winds, instead they are taken by the grim reaper for his mackintosh.
Obviously its bullshit but I liked the story, my grandad rally scared the shit outta me, he never bought 'snow white ' as a bedtime story, and i too have written today of crows, have a 9 my favourite hare.
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| Re: When Im Gone by New Life Drug |
11-Dec-02/10:01 AM |
the last line almost ruined it for me, i hate flow interuption !
Okay then had my moan ! this could be REALLY good, you put a good slant on the philosophy of death and this simmers with empathy, its a real thought provoker so you've touched on a good subject, however carry on working on it, get rid of the numbering as it sucks, I wanna read this again when you finished it. And geez you gotta finish this, resubmit the baby for more feedback, zzinnia, gods wife, poeat and knowit, horus8, tintag intransit, and many more may occasionally criticise but they are crystal muses of help.
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| Re: just plain orange by New Life Drug |
11-Dec-02/10:03 AM |
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| Re: Me and Mrs. Jones by bondjedi |
11-Dec-02/10:06 AM |
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shit its back on boys pass the plastic lightsabre.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
11-Dec-02/10:10 AM |
Your poetry is unique and always
caresses
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| Re: all sex by roses are read |
11-Dec-02/10:15 AM |
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My brothers paranoid, but i told him its not about him.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
13-Dec-02/2:14 AM |
As i read this i thought of a line that makes no sense at all for a poem 'take a slice of my life and add it to drink, take a husband and wife, what do you think ?
weird, but it made me think albeit i'm scaring myself -nice job as usual
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| Re: Bliss without the Mistress by rlorrah |
13-Dec-02/2:16 AM |
Like it,
have you ever had bliss WITH the mistress, now theirs a poem?
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| Re: Some asshole with a shit band. by Plasticgirlwithgun |
13-Dec-02/2:20 AM |
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Deliciously evil and bitchy, shoot me in slow mo plasticgirl
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| Re: Mum why are grandmas arms so baggy? by ==Doylum |
13-Dec-02/2:22 AM |
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ahhhh the most wicked of all haikus, this made me crack up to the point of snotting all over my face so thank you for making me feel so fucking attractive. -10- go granny
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| Re: alienheart by Bill Z Bub |
13-Dec-02/2:25 AM |
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Bought back bad memories of the 'probe violation' i suffered at the hands of Darth Invader, hes a dirty bastard.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
13-Dec-02/2:44 AM |
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
13-Dec-02/2:48 AM |
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You could fine tune this, also i'd lose the hard girl vibe in this and add some vulnerability it reads like you've got too much attitude, mix the bag add some heart to it, it sounds like your hiding stuff, your writings good by the way but it left me unsatisfied. **5**
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| Re: Prize gained life, Death in wages by GTK |
13-Dec-02/2:52 AM |
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Affecting ! check line one though shouldn't bath be bathe?
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| Re: On a chill morning by razorgrin |
13-Dec-02/3:47 AM |
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| Re: Transformers "a higher, vaster, deeper meaning". by Bachus |
13-Dec-02/6:24 AM |
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Transformer Smurf ? just a disturbing idea
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