Re: Sissy Faggot by Shardik	17-Dec-04/11:54 PM
This poem rules. 10.
Re: Girly by Dovina	3-Feb-05/11:40 PM
I didn't want to like this, but I did anyway. Delete the last 2 lines.
Re: My Time In Jail by Brittanyy	3-Feb-05/11:42 PM
Love the line about your shoes.
Re: Amphetamine Witches & Scrabble by Bachus	3-Mar-05/1:06 AM
Scrap the first stanza, albeit with my fair regards- the rest I be liking. 8.9
regarding some deleted poem...	3-Mar-05/1:11 AM
Line 3 is too wordy - still I think this has potential - also, consider omitting the "inspired by" addition - it just takes away from your creation. we're all inspired by things - that's what the definition of "poet" is. Let your poem reflect that inspiration, with hopes it inspires another.
regarding some deleted poem...	6-Mar-05/11:01 PM
If you could haiku it, 10. As is, 9. I re-read 4 times.
Re: The Privaleged by i_am_the_popsicle	6-Mar-05/11:06 PM
spelling problems: priveleged luxury coerced 7.9 regardless
Re: The Game of Categories by jessicazee	22-Mar-05/11:04 PM
This poem sucks ass, I wrote it and had no edits, sorry you even read far enough to see this comment. I am ashamed. D'oh.
Re: Cold Turkey by johnnyfontaine23	22-Mar-05/11:06 PM
Make this a prose poem and it will rock, after you add a few more lines. Potential.
Re: The conflict begin by luzrheroguy	22-Mar-05/11:09 PM
Third stanza is rocking me...First one, line 4 almost stopped me from going on...try to keep the contractions to a minimum. Also, the title's grammatical problem needs to be addressed. Nonetheless, I still like it. 7.5.
Re: Tribulations of the ear and eye by oneglove	22-Mar-05/11:13 PM
Dude, this is a good story. And I hardly ever call anyone dude. A suggestion: keep the format, but punctuate everything if you are going to use quotes. Make it more like a dialogue in a story, with periods and commas. It will be easier to understand. 8.7.
Re: Reasonably Good by Dovina	23-Mar-05/12:05 AM
Get rid of the spaces between stanzas--what is space anyway but the thing that separates us? I'm drunk, I like this, 9.3.
Re: Kansas City by PodPoet	11-Apr-05/11:48 PM
I wanted more...another 5 lines, please. 9
regarding some deleted poem...	11-Apr-05/11:52 PM
Get rid of all the ellipses(...)... The title rules. Made me read it twice. Made me want to delete the last 4 lines just because, don't hate me, but they sound like something Johnny Depp will say in "Pirates of the Caribbean 7". Also, you're not so subtly channeling Poe. Regardless, I like it. 8.5
regarding some deleted poem...	16-Apr-05/9:42 PM
I read it alound to my cat, he licked himself. Love it. 9
Re: Birmingham gardens by INTRANSIT	16-Apr-05/11:09 PM
I think the first phrase should have a question mark, and I also want to hear real colors of the "brightly colored fish" at the end (i.e. fuschia? chartreuse?) but wholly I'm lovin' this. 9.4
Re: I do... Not! by Billy Fights	27-Apr-05/1:02 AM
Great song lyrics. Do you play an instrument? 9
Re: Untitled by nothingtoanyone	27-Apr-05/1:05 AM
Love "darkened yellow". Wished you could stray from "cry" and "high" rhyme scheme, but still was pulled in by beautiful line geometry anyhoo....8.3
Re: Somehow, Hope by DeadtotheWorld	27-Apr-05/1:09 AM
I kind of get where you're coming from...but to make it more accessible (without, I think, losing your mysteriousness)...omit the capitalized "Sweet" and "Endeavor" and maybe replace with more concrete sentiment...i.e. colors/places/smells that are real to you...will make your excellent last two lines more meaningful. So close.
Re: am i right? by celticskatermatt1	27-Apr-05/1:13 AM
2nd line...should be "you're" instead of "your". You have so much feeling here...try to relate it to us in real language...pretend like you are telling your best friend how you feel in this poem in real words, instead of trying to "write a poem." Because I think you can. More, please.