on skittles by Freethinker1602
15 Oct 2009, 11:22 AM
Reword this in a way that eliminates the duplicities. Like -bright colors-- you have more than once. Trust your reader. We've seen skittles. And enjoy them often!
replying on To Poets Whose Writing is Fecal. by SupremeDreamer
5 Jan 2009, 8:25 AM
To those that would teach poetry.
mofo
mofo
on To Poets Whose Writing is Fecal. by SupremeDreamer
2 Jan 2009, 7:33 PM
on 2012 - The Haiku Remix. by DreamerSupreme
28 Dec 2008, 4:48 PM
wouldn't have to wait if someone would just push the damn thing.
on Horus, Thy Eye. by SupremeDreamer
28 Dec 2008, 4:47 PM
Amen. and then some.
replying on Gadgets and Poems by Dovina
10 Sep 2008, 10:29 AM
I saw a gal in a bookstore once (imagine that!). I think she would write out her piece in long lines, then accordian the paper left to right and then fold/strike/fold/strike words almost at random. I'm assuming alot here, but still. This is to say I agree with your suggestion.
on SWF seeks SWM by Bethy
10 Sep 2008, 10:24 AM
-more nuts, this is wrong. hahahahahaha.
on :: chameleon by elementalidad
10 Sep 2008, 10:22 AM
I disagree with Dovina on this one. I think it's the best of the four.
replying on :: snowsounds by elementalidad
10 Sep 2008, 10:20 AM
I'm gonna back Dovina. Loosen the reins a little element-
on Suicide Note [Disposal Instructions Included] by SupremeDreamer
10 Sep 2008, 10:08 AM
I'd like to see the first line gone. The title covers it. But the Main part, I'd like to see really odd things there, not the drugs and the sex etc. Not that true grunge doesn't have a place, I'm just not one for "shock" value. Write another one my way please, and I'll compare, and, maybe concede. Whaddaya got ta lose?
replying on 5 minute poem: section by Bill Z Bub
10 Sep 2008, 10:03 AM
I read it again and see what you mean. But, I think there is enough expressiveness in the two previous lines. Though, I know repetetiveness is a tool I have not yet learned. Gonna post up ?
replying on 5 minute poem: section by Bill Z Bub
22 Aug 2008, 9:30 AM
I agree. Though - theives is what they are- seems weightless to me.
on Gadgets and Poems by Dovina
17 Aug 2008, 4:16 PM
D, I think the whole first sentence should go. I'd like to see the carpets rise be your opener. But that's me. hope you and Kansas are doing fine.
on ayow by skaskowski
15 Aug 2008, 4:59 PM
ska.
on Cormac Plays by Skamper
8 Jan 2008, 2:06 PM
Zero Mostell. Hah! Great stuff.
replying on Running Local by INTRANSIT
31 Dec 2007, 6:48 AM
Neither. Pretty straightforward actually. Don't be lazy, D.