Help | About | Suggestions | Alms | Chat [0] | Users [0] | Log In | Join
 Search:
Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments   

Suicide Note [Disposal Instructions Included] (Other) by SupremeDreamer
Knives and razors... kinda melodramatic, that sort of suicide. I've reserved a deathly foil of tar, and a tiny diabetic needle in a little safe box buried under the roots of an oak tree by the river at the Childrens' Discovery Meadow in downtown San Jose. I also have a safe deposit box with $2000 dollars for weed, meth, liquor, motel room, and a young slut for a night or perhaps two. It's sort of bona fide exit strategy, for when I decide that I've had enough. I don't plan to leave a note... 'cept maybe for the cleaning lady- just some instructions for her when she finds me. It would read something like this: Sorry, you poor, pussy-wort immigrant cleaning lady... If you're done screaming in Spanish and can read my well written English, you can forgo making a fuss and just quietly haul my bloated carcass and deposit it into the dumpster in the back. Thank you. PS: I left 120$ in the bedside drawer, consider it a glorified tip. Go buy some drugs with it.

Up the ladder: The secret press
Down the ladder: Deeper

You must be logged in to leave comments. Vote:

Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 10
.. 31
.. 10
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00

Arithmetic Mean: 8.714286
Weighted score: 5.998925
Overall Rank: 1309
Posted: September 5, 2008 5:57 PM PDT; Last modified: September 5, 2008 6:44 PM PDT
View voting details
Comments:
[7] Dovina @ 68.183.245.151 | 6-Sep-08/6:31 AM | Reply
The whole thing is melodramatic, not just knives and razors, a teenie kinda pimple. I expect better from street folks. Not that the execution is bad, or the titanium quill rusty, just the nonsense of the whole idea.
[9] alvinb @ 124.217.79.105 | 8-Sep-08/1:03 AM | Reply
Nice one dude... now will you give me the better Exit srategy???
[9] Bethy @ 165.154.46.44 | 8-Sep-08/12:09 PM | Reply
its good to know things are taken care of in the event of the writers demise, tip n all...however, i feel a little dirty and almost sinister when i say i like this poem...i figure its my dark side comin' out ...bravo, good one
[8] INTRANSIT @ 69.23.141.215 | 10-Sep-08/10:08 AM | Reply
I'd like to see the first line gone. The title covers it. But the Main part, I'd like to see really odd things there, not the drugs and the sex etc. Not that true grunge doesn't have a place, I'm just not one for "shock" value. Write another one my way please, and I'll compare, and, maybe concede. Whaddaya got ta lose?
[n/a] DreamerSupreme @ 75.18.164.147 > INTRANSIT | 15-Dec-08/7:32 AM | Reply
That's how I'd like to kill myself if I decided that that was the best option left to me. Sorry if that's too boring for you.

I can characterize it and make it the suicide of a bisexual transvestite who is obsessed with occult ritual if you'd like. Being odd is not a difficult task for me. ;)
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 79.78.94.70 | 16-Sep-08/3:28 PM | Reply
Oil my bald cheeks.
[n/a] DreamerSupreme @ 75.18.164.147 > -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. | 15-Dec-08/7:25 AM | Reply
Do your damned job and consume the weaklings. They're all-over the fucking rankerville dragging their wet blankets and spewing hallmark emo-love-thy-neighbor-and-honor-his-virgin-daughter baby shit all over the fucking place. You can oil thy own bum and then accept the rod of brutal disgrace. Do you not see that your horrid crustaceans have allowed the embrowning to envelope the whole bloody ship? Enough of indulging your twisted faggotry in the lower decks! Perfom thy holy function, you misplaced cumquat!!
[10] deleted user @ 68.120.225.169 | 29-Sep-08/6:26 PM | Reply
I'd far sooner kill the likes of you all before I'd kill myself.

I've read something that rings similiar to this; in Chuck Palahniuk's (sp?) novel 'Choke'. Apparently, they're making it into a full-length feature film. Dude, contact me...immediately.
[10] deleted user @ 68.120.225.169 | 29-Sep-08/6:27 PM | Reply
tht19832000@yahoo.com
[n/a] New Life Drug @ 76.126.35.200 | 19-Oct-08/7:46 PM | Reply
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After 6 long years I have returned to poemranker. God this is awkward...
[n/a] New Life Drug @ 76.126.35.200 | 19-Oct-08/7:51 PM | Reply
P.S. That box will be MINE. What, you thought you were the only person who knew where the Guadalupe River was?
San Jose native speaking.
[n/a] DreamerSupreme @ 75.18.164.147 > New Life Drug | 15-Dec-08/7:34 AM | Reply
You'd never be able to find my hiding spots boy. You're addressing a professional steetbum, not a shoddy poser, you silly child!
[10] deleted user @ 64.183.31.242 > DreamerSupreme | 28-Jan-09/1:58 PM | Reply
You subnormal miscreant, why don't you check your emails once in a while?

I'm may be up that way soon. I should want to meet.
268 view(s)




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001