Re: My Friend Burgers by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?	23-Sep-03/1:20 AM
This is the best poeme about Burgers that could possibly be written. 10.
Re: a comment on In the Cold Waste by razorgrin	22-Sep-03/7:06 PM
"You have no right to critisize my work." If you post your "poetry" on a poetry-ranking site, everyone who reads it has the right to criticise it. If you're such a spineless crybaby you can't take it when people rightly tell you you can't write, maybe interaction with other people isn't for you. Instead, try writing your poetry in a special secret diary with a flying unicorn pony on a rainbow in space on the front where nobody else can read it. You clearly have no idea what this haiku is about, and you're clearly only attacking it because razorgrin was a meanie to you. You, sir, are a dunce.
Re: a comment on Untitled (A Dark Angel Litmus) by Geschäftsreise	22-Sep-03/3:33 PM
When using the MEDIOCRE POEME CHECKLISTE to rank, the score is 10 or the number of checked boxes, whichever is least.
Re: a comment on You Had To Go by peaceseeker	22-Sep-03/1:10 PM
No, it would make an "ass out of mptuous and you". Which leaves me in the clear. Furthermore, sir, there is no word "assumptuous" in the English language. I no longer feel inclined to call you a capital fellow.
Re: a comment on Addiction causing stupidity by LuckyJoe	22-Sep-03/2:56 AM
What? It was in your own best interest to lose? So therefore you won because you lost (or something)? Don't be even more of an idiot than I think you are already just for thinking Watson was a detective. I can still remember the look of indignation on your bloated face as you responded to the "Musical Eden" debacle with cries of "FACT" and "tsk" and "musical eden: pure fucking crap created to see how well i could predict your pathetic ranting". Having given up on your attempts to convince the world that you've somehow been toying with me, you've resigned yourself to one last, desperate bid to save face. You think you're the winner because you've progressed as a writer? If that means you'll never use the phrase "exquisite melancholy of the supernatural" again, then it's as much a victory for mankind as it is for the withered prawne I see before me.
Re: Trailer Park: Diary of a Hayseed by DreamerSupreme	22-Sep-03/1:36 AM
So rife with clerical errors and rancid splats of cack that after absorbing this secretion I think I'm going to have to have a lie down. Yet again you prove yourself the master of giving bloated pieces absurdly pretentious and insipidly whimsical titles. "Diary of a Hayseed" my arse. No doubt this piece was intended to 'decorate the reader's window' with a beautiful collage of midwestern serenity. But after the appalling ending, made even worse by the painful, yet touchingly poignant use of an ellipsis, the only thing decorating my window was a giant shower of vomit...
Re: You Had To Go by peaceseeker	21-Sep-03/8:35 PM
[_] AABB rhyming scheme [X] About romantic love [_] About writing [_] About suicide or self-mutilation [_] Arbitrary indentation [X] Arbitrary line breaks [_] Autobiographical but in the third person [_] Clerical errors [_] Clichéd imagery (gazing out of window, pits of despair) [_] Clichéd rhymes (love/above, heart/apart) [_] 'Depression' words (putrid, wretched, darkness) [X] Devoid of alliteration or any such linguistic embellishments [X] Devoid of rhyme [X] Devoid of simile, reification or any such literary devices [X] Devoid of wondrous or fantastical imagery [_] Drug reference [_] Elves, unicorns, etc. [_] Insipidly whimsical or zany [_] Internet shorthand or emoticons [_] Leaving rant [X] Lower case [_] 'Lyrics' [X] Melodramatic [_] Naively religious or superstitious [_] Obsessed with femininity [_] Overabundance of ellipses [X] Pointedly unanswered questions [_] Rage against the machine [X] Reference to the author's 'social life' [_] Repetition of a word or phrase to the point of nausea [_] Sanctimonious [X] Self-obsessed [_] Sentimental [_] Smugly-named protagonist [_] Thesaurophilia [_] Untitled [_] Vicarious wish fulfilment
Re: a comment on I hate your guts and think you're stupid by horus8	21-Sep-03/8:10 PM
Look at everyone caring.
Re: confused by windlessbreez	21-Sep-03/1:50 PM
I say "MEDIOCRE POEME CHECKLISTE AHOY", and frantically pull my trousers down in preparation. [_] AABB rhyming scheme [_] About romantic love [_] About writing [_] About suicide or self-mutilation [_] Arbitrary indentation [X] Arbitrary line breaks [_] Autobiographical but in the third person [X] Clerical errors [_] Clichéd imagery (gazing out of window, pits of despair) [_] Clichéd rhymes (love/above, heart/apart) [_] 'Depression' words (putrid, wretched, darkness) [X] Devoid of alliteration or any such linguistic embellishments [X] Devoid of rhyme [X] Devoid of simile, reification or any such literary devices [X] Devoid of wondrous or fantastical imagery [_] Drug reference [_] Elves, unicorns, etc. [_] Insipidly whimsical or zany [_] Internet shorthand or emoticons [_] Leaving rant [X] Lower case only [_] 'Lyrics' [_] Melodramatic [_] Naively religious or superstitious [_] Obsessed with femininity [X] Overabundance of ellipses [X] Pointedly unanswered questions [_] Rage against the machine [_] Reference to the author's 'social life' [_] Repetition of a word or phrase to the point of nausea [_] Sanctimonious [X] Self-obsessed [_] Sentimental [_] Smugly-named protagonist [_] Thesaurophilia [_] Untitled [_] Vicarious wish fulfilment -10-
Re: breaking hearts by ThePariahDog	21-Sep-03/11:12 AM
[X] AABB rhyming scheme [X] About romantic love [_] About poetry-writing [_] About suicide or self-mutilation [_] Arbitrary indentation [_] Arbitrary line breaks [_] Autobiographical but in the third person [_] Clerical errors [_] Cliched imagery (staring out of window, pits of despair) [X] Cliched rhymes (love/above etc.) [X] Devoid of alliteration or any such linguistic embellishments [_] Devoid of rhyme [X] Devoid of simile, reification or any such literary devices [X] Devoid of wond'rous or fantastical imagery [_] Drug references [_] Elves, unicorns, etc. [_] Exclamation points used to mark 'the funny bits' [_] Insipidly whimsical or zany [_] Leaving rant [X] Lower case only [_] 'Lyrics' [X] Melodramatic [_] Naively religious or superstitious [_] Obsessed with femininity [_] Overabundance of ellipses [_] Overuse of 'depression' words (putrid, wretched, darkness, etc) [_] Pointedly unanswered questions [_] Protagonist has a smug name [_] Rage against the machine [_] References to the author's 'social life' [_] Repetition of a single word or phrase to the point of nausea [_] Sanctimoniously moral [X] Self-obsessed [_] Sentimental [_] Thesaurophilia [_] Use of internet shorthand or emoticons [_] Vicarious wish fulfilment
Re: Lotion by impert&ent	20-Sep-03/10:53 PM
[An extract from "Disabled Living: A hands-on guide to life without legs" by Ian Crushed] Chapter 1 - Lotion Lotion, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. Lo-ti-on: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to rest, at three, on the teeth. Lo. Ti. On. Lotionless limbs left out to dry, as life gives way to husk. Disabled glands secrete mere dust, and slowly the body roasts. I can barely engage my harness for want of lubrication. For want of that precious lacquer. For want... of lotion.
Re: heaven's will by ThePariahDog	20-Sep-03/9:58 PM
Jesus died for you.
Re: a comment on Shakespearean Sonnets & Poets by Y2kSlamPoet	20-Sep-03/9:55 PM
If you were to compare yourself to Shakespeare, what would you say?
Re: a comment on Spider Meth Adventure by Y2kSlamPoet	20-Sep-03/9:10 PM
don't talk to me about drugs like i don't know shit man i've been through shit you wouldn't believe like this one time i dropped about three pink jessops and couldn't even find them again even though they were right in front of me because i was so mashed from the night before when i got well drunk u fuckin n00b
Re: a comment on minotaur by Bill Z Bub	20-Sep-03/6:49 PM
Is it supposed to be some kind of allegory?
Re: minotaur by Bill Z Bub	20-Sep-03/5:18 PM
I don't get it. Is this supposed to be some kind of allegory or are you just giving some late advice to Theseus in all lower case?
Re: a comment on Shakespearean Sonnets & Poets by Y2kSlamPoet	20-Sep-03/5:02 PM
Y2kSlamPoete and Don-Quixote are other accounts SupremeDreamer registered.
Re: a comment on AIDS in a Glass by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.	20-Sep-03/4:34 PM
Yes, it rhymes. What's your motherfucking problem?
Re: a comment on Spider Meth Adventure by Y2kSlamPoet	20-Sep-03/3:07 PM
You are a very arrogant young man. You may think you are invincible, that your proud dungarees will be pulled up beyond your chin for all time. But how was it, do you think, that I became trapped inside my hideous mechanical gibbet in the first place? Drugs, my lad.
Re: Spider Meth Adventure by Y2kSlamPoet	20-Sep-03/11:48 AM
Wow drugs man drugs shit have you got any drugs let's go get some drugs I've never had drugs before yeah well that's because you're only 12 here have this cigarette paper i've rolled into a tube shit man shit what if the feds see this whoa thats underground meth where did you get that it's totally hardcore fuck wank [_] AABB rhyming scheme [_] About romantic love [_] About poetry-writing [X] About suicide or self-mutilation [_] Arbitrary indentation [X] Arbitrary line breaks [_] Autobiographical but in the third person [X] Clerical errors [_] Cliched imagery (staring out of window, pits of despair) [_] Cliched rhymes (love/above etc.) [X] Devoid of alliteration or any such linguistic embellishments [X] Devoid of rhyme [X] Devoid of simile, reification or any such literary devices [_] Devoid of wond'rous or fantastical imagery [X] Drug references [_] Elves, unicorns, etc. [_] Exclamation points used to mark 'the funny bits' [_] Insipidly whimsical or zany [_] Leaving rant [_] Lower case only [_] Melodramatic [_] Naively religious or superstitious [_] Obsessed with femininity [_] Overabundance of ellipses [_] Overuse of 'depression' words (putrid, wretched, darkness, etc) [_] Pointedly unanswered questions [X] Protagonist has a smug name [_] Rage against the machine [_] References to the author's 'social life' [_] Repetition of a single word or phrase to the point of nausea [_] Sanctimoniously moral [_] Sentimental [_] Self-pity [_] Thesaurophilia [_] Use of internet shorthand or emoticons [X] Vicarious wish fulfilment