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breaking hearts (Free verse) by ThePariahDog
breaking hearts it's just something i do tearing them apart what about you? i remember how you said you'd rather be dead than get back together with me that's fine, i'll let it be just because i know you can't see that i still care for you and that i can make your wish come true

Down the ladder: Looking Back

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.5
Weighted score: 4.865529
Overall Rank: 10350
Posted: September 20, 2003 10:26 PM PDT; Last modified: September 20, 2003 10:26 PM PDT
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Comments:
[n/a] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. @ 202.8.187.89 | 21-Sep-03/11:12 AM | Reply
[X] AABB rhyming scheme
[X] About romantic love
[_] About poetry-writing
[_] About suicide or self-mutilation
[_] Arbitrary indentation
[_] Arbitrary line breaks
[_] Autobiographical but in the third person
[_] Clerical errors
[_] Cliched imagery (staring out of window, pits of despair)
[X] Cliched rhymes (love/above etc.)
[X] Devoid of alliteration or any such linguistic embellishments
[_] Devoid of rhyme
[X] Devoid of simile, reification or any such literary devices
[X] Devoid of wond'rous or fantastical imagery
[_] Drug references
[_] Elves, unicorns, etc.
[_] Exclamation points used to mark 'the funny bits'
[_] Insipidly whimsical or zany
[_] Leaving rant
[X] Lower case only
[_] 'Lyrics'
[X] Melodramatic
[_] Naively religious or superstitious
[_] Obsessed with femininity
[_] Overabundance of ellipses
[_] Overuse of 'depression' words (putrid, wretched, darkness, etc)
[_] Pointedly unanswered questions
[_] Protagonist has a smug name
[_] Rage against the machine
[_] References to the author's 'social life'
[_] Repetition of a single word or phrase to the point of nausea
[_] Sanctimoniously moral
[X] Self-obsessed
[_] Sentimental
[_] Thesaurophilia
[_] Use of internet shorthand or emoticons
[_] Vicarious wish fulfilment
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