Re: inadequate by skaskowski	2-Feb-06/2:00 PM
Good up to the last line, which kills it.
Re: Nomads by amanda_dcosta	2-Feb-06/2:05 PM
You will always get quibbles about 5-7-5 in a haiku here on poemranker unless you toe the line. Other are not so picky. I see the birds as not really wandering, as you understand them, giving more than average credit to birds. Thats good.
regarding some deleted poem...	3-Feb-06/7:03 AM
I was with you on this up to "painstakingly drawn." Then I thought you drew the mask with makup. Now I think you used a literal meaning of painstakingly, not the usual meaning. After that I was back on track. The yellow and green bothered me too. Well done.
regarding some deleted poem...	3-Feb-06/7:06 AM
Probably a yearling deer. They can leap as if flying. Maybe "flew" in the last line.
Re: Time by sk8rs_rule_all	3-Feb-06/7:09 AM
misspellings, cliche in the last line. Do yoy mean "if only I" in the redundent first line?
Re: Whales in Gastineau Channel by zodiac	3-Feb-06/10:31 AM
"breaches" as in breaches the water, is an intolerable twist, I'm afaid. And you do need something before "Nikons" for grammar's sake or as your gramma must have said said. I suppose "purchase" means something in this context. And "yen" as in yearning is old usage misplaced in the new. And Earth's kiss, well, you've been in water and air up to now, why enter the earth?
Re: Coney Island Fall by ecargo	3-Feb-06/3:10 PM
We couldn't ride the Cyclone even at Christmastime a couple of years ago. Couldn't even buy a dog. Much less in February.
Re: Exodus of Babylon by SupremeDreamer	3-Feb-06/7:40 PM
This sounds like some folks' version of Christianity. If you mean it as satire on that, then 10. Since I'm unsure, 7
Re: I'm there by amanda_dcosta	4-Feb-06/7:58 AM
If you are like one of the sheep in Ps. 23, then I think stiking closer to that image would help. The last line and the "restful waters" line are there, but the "love never . . ." line is from Paul. On the other hand, it's pretty hard to write it better than David did.
Re: Inoperative Head Mechanism by D. $ Fontera	4-Feb-06/8:01 AM
Funny. The first line is wordy.
regarding some deleted poem...	5-Feb-06/3:22 PM
Interesting, how it draws a different scene each time, like a fractal or some equation. Also, you've selected a likable tune. Oh, we’re supposed to be commenting on the poem – it’s ok.
Re: can you sing me a song by richa	5-Feb-06/3:38 PM
Why is it sad that the joyful reader cannot sing sweetest of all? It's too much to ask, so you must mean something else. To be a joyful reader is not wanton, unless you mean unproductive in the field of things read, like an appreciator of Tolstoy, for example. But I see no fault in that.
Re: Untitled by click64	5-Feb-06/4:18 PM
A good outline for a poem, though a very common one. Practice unusual ways of saying it. Look for underlying truths, lies, beliefs that hinder your goals.
Re: Pendragon by ecargo	6-Feb-06/12:38 PM
I waive my rights - tunic and cloak – simplistic and cliché. Whoever wrote those words had a grip on what matters. A descent poem.
Re: Sonnet by zodiac	6-Feb-06/12:56 PM
The word "bored" spoils it. The last sentence can go, I think - leaves it more mysterious. Klar-ed???
Re: The Perigenetic Prayer by ALChemy	7-Feb-06/11:52 AM
Imago and Poe must be a couple of your favorites.
Re: Faith on a cross by Caducus	7-Feb-06/12:09 PM
I like the Judas tree reference. The name derives from the tradition that Judas Iscariot hanged himself from this tree, and when it's in bloom, it blushes with shame every year.
regarding some deleted poem...	7-Feb-06/6:10 PM
Confessions done more out of spite than shame is really apt, and using it again with pain is all right too. I could do without the enumeration list at the end. Good work.
Re: Going Away to Fight a War by wilco	9-Feb-06/7:31 AM
I can almost hear a country guitar and sorrowful hilbilly tune. Nice.
Re: writer's block by Zoetrope	10-Feb-06/1:01 PM
Funny and serious. A good read. Welcome.