Re: Luna Moth by razorgrin	29-Aug-02/8:23 AM
But it's going off to its death! How cruel!
Re: Petrarchan Sonnet about Love by emilyowey	29-Aug-02/8:06 AM
I like this - it's good to see old forms being used, and the meditation on love is also a very fitting thing for a sonnet. The 'to've' I don't like - shoe-horning it in to keep the metre - but apart from that this is really good.
Re: Elephant To A Man by nonee	29-Aug-02/7:58 AM
It's an interesting angle, but the u's are horrible. So is 'million/billion years' - decide which.
Re: 22nd Anniversary by Frass	29-Aug-02/6:36 AM
This is just lovely. I don't know what's in that Blue Ridge Air but I'd like some
Re: Too far by heroditus	29-Aug-02/2:34 AM
I like this though I'm not convinced by the ending. Good rhythmic beat and central image.
Re: The Hand of God by Christof	29-Aug-02/1:14 AM
That's very kind Mrs God. I've had odd pieces published here and there in small mags in Britain, but certainly not in book form. No one wnats my stuff enough! But I'm glad you do. Thank you.
Re: Suicide I by disturbedone182	28-Aug-02/7:37 AM
See comments on Suicide III. Please.
Re: Suicide III by disturbedone182	28-Aug-02/7:35 AM
Please write about something else. Or if you're going to do teenage angst, do it with humour. Think of Morrissey - he's a funny chap, his irony undercuts all that 'to die by your side' stuff, and that is truly touching. Whereas this is bogus (judging by the fact that you're alive enough to post this). If you need help, get help; if this is meant as poetry, well, it ain't.
Re: The Big NO by alexander	28-Aug-02/3:43 AM
I like this - mysterious and urgent and visceral. The aftermath of what? Is it rape or her own death to whcih she says NO? I like an enigma like this.
Re: Chew your food! by <{Baba^Yaga}>	28-Aug-02/3:28 AM
This strikes me as a bland meal. Only add salt? You want some cumin in there, maybe some turmeric...a kind of cannibal curry...
Re: Three Daughters by <~>	28-Aug-02/3:13 AM
You have a unique vocabulary - 'charmant', 'knurled'. Beautiful stuff. I don't know if I'd want to keep archaims like 'twixt' and 'O'er' and 'dropt', but the aural music of this poem is lovely. This is like a Nordic saga, and that's A Good Thing.
Re: Awesome Heir by Shin-Bojangles	28-Aug-02/3:07 AM
If you were listening to Golden Years, does that mean you were listening to the Worf Of Godlike Genius that is the album Low? Good Christ I hope so. And look, I just added to your amazing litany of lunacy. I still know nothing about Aragorn. But by jiminy I know my David Bowie.
Re: Comparisons by anagram	28-Aug-02/2:58 AM
I think this is too specific to you anagram, there's lots of emotion here but it doesn't really seem solid to me, though I like your circular structure.
Re: Hunny by Venus	28-Aug-02/2:40 AM
Reading this again, i don't see how Babbitt can object to the ending. It's a sting in the tail and it saves the poem from being just a lament - the note of defiance and revenge gives a slightly wicked hint of hope. The relationship sounds sounds as if it was once so good....as for Sylvia Plath, you seem far more sane and in control both personally and poetically, and I mean that as a compliment.
Re: 'The Grey' Triplet by Shin-Bojangles	28-Aug-02/1:42 AM
The mention of Enya tunes makes me chuckle
Re: Tryst by <~>	28-Aug-02/1:38 AM
Well, I think this stays funny after a couple of readings - it's a kind of gallows humour, becuase you know why it feels all wrong and yet it feels all right. I know the feeling. It often gives me cause to laugh on a long and lonely night. Oh ha ha ha.
Re: Innsmouth by razorgrin	27-Aug-02/7:53 AM
I shall tootle down to my library forthwith in search of creepiness. I like N Hawthorne though - what do you reckon of him?
Re: School by shwenatjadeflower	27-Aug-02/7:51 AM
Red heads must stick together. We are an abused minority.
Re: Two Eagles by Frass	27-Aug-02/7:48 AM
This sounds great and I like the cultural history clash - this is an era caught in a moment. I don't like 'Keybored' though - tricksy.
Re: Reflected, Dreamed by Frass	27-Aug-02/7:36 AM
I find the rhymes a little too facile -the syntactical contortions that you employ to produce the rhymes ('from deep is gleaned') are correspondingly awkward. But maybe it's just because I don't like Dylan Thomas either...