| Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments |
|
Suicide III (Free verse) by disturbedone182 Temptation rises within me
My wrists tingle as they bleed
I feel no love, I feel no hate
If I felt regret, it'd be too late
What's the point of going on?
Why is ending my pain so wrong?
Will they notice? Will they care?
Why does my life seem so unfair?
How will things be different when I die?
How many people will ask, "why?"?
Will I really go to hell?
Why did no one catch me when I fell?
I don't give a shit anymore
For my life is just a bore
I'll just say my last good-byes
Before I go commit suicide
Why should I keep from ending of my life
Why should I not die tonight?
Aim the gun, keep my hands steady
I owe the world no fucking apology ...
Up the ladder:
Baby-sitting
Down the ladder:
the past
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 0.6666667
Posted: August 27, 2002 6:48 PM PDT; Last modified: September 28, 2002 9:11 PM PDTWeighted score: 4.483454 Overall Rank: 12842 Comments:
[4]
anagram @ 195.92.168.166
|
27-Aug-02/7:16 PM
|
Reply
OK enough is enough.I couldn't take 'Suicide II' or any future Suicides. You should listen to 'Don't Try Suicide' by Queen,track 2 side 2 'The Game' album and see if the great man can steer you in the right direction.
Of good god, see all the other adolescent angsters on this site and do a group hug. All your stuff is so over-the-top melodramatic, filled with such serious problems as pimples and being grounded on Friday night so you cannot go to the mall. Just wait, it gets worse. But seriously, contact all the teeny bops on the site and give a big hug to cure your sad miserable writing.
You know p&k the more time I spend going through random poetry the more I want to agree with you. Well atually you couldn't be more correct, but their just looking for someplace to post their stuff. Maybe we should have a referral site for teenage angst.
I'm with Anagram; hang in there, D.O. Tomorrow you may meet someone who'll help you to see clear to a different perspective on your life a then we'll all be rating your odes to a butterfly, or some such.
Please write about something else. Or if you're going to do teenage angst, do it with humour. Think of Morrissey - he's a funny chap, his irony undercuts all that 'to die by your side' stuff, and that is truly touching. Whereas this is bogus (judging by the fact that you're alive enough to post this). If you need help, get help; if this is meant as poetry, well, it ain't.
I've seen a suicide. Guy shot himself with a .22 handgun. It's nothing more than sad and selfish. We owe you no apology either. BUT there's a rythm.2
139 view(s)
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
