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Reflected, Dreamed (Free verse) by Frass Rent, spurned
spent, turned
freshly cut
and newly burned
a shattering clack
emitted, screamed
echoes alone
reflected, dreamed...
refraction back
enfolded, preened
a merging moan
from deep is gleaned
harmonic swell
is upward beamed
a fragile life
is held between.
Up the ladder:
School
Down the ladder:
Escapism
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.0
Posted: August 18, 2002 9:28 PM PDT; Last modified: August 18, 2002 9:28 PM PDTWeighted score: 5.2689414 Overall Rank: 3808 Comments:
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poetandknowit @ 65.101.212.144
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18-Aug-02/9:56 PM
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Reply
Huh? you spent the rent on freshly cut crack? But then again lots of lawn mowing imagery. Wow! Excellent work!!
My favorite Thomas poems are his B-day poems. I like to read those in the state he was always in. Did I mention that the above poem is brillant!
Cheers! I don't know what thiws is about but it's well done a that's what counts. Although I can never get use to sentences being turned on their behinds for sake of a rhymn. (fromdeepisgleaned,isupwardbeamed)how about deeply gleaned and upwardly beamed.
thats what counts? if you don't know what its about whats the point? Oh lovely use of words, sorry i don't get you but it was rather well argued wasn't it chaps?
Yelp. What was that, oh i think it was a little puppy. Frass i think your super. 7/10
I find the rhymes a little too facile -the syntactical contortions that you employ to produce the rhymes ('from deep is gleaned') are correspondingly awkward. But maybe it's just because I don't like Dylan Thomas either...
Frass, I like it. :-)
good turns, transitions, juxations. Upside down i read and see a meaning that is very, incredibly gleaming. Love it. Love it. 8/10
I like you, royalflesh.
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