| Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments |
|
The Big NO (Free verse) by alexander Impaled upon the stick that was her body
She lay gasping in the aftermath
Wailing sirens filled the air with their screams
She bled internally to a place where dreams die
Sounds came in on her like overpowering waves
Drowning her with their salty spray
She hungered for oblivion
A darkness embraced her
She said NO
Up the ladder:
The Advice
Down the ladder:
Pools and Eden's Apples
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 5.2352943
Posted: August 26, 2002 4:36 AM PDT; Last modified: August 26, 2002 4:36 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.2072463 Overall Rank: 4528 Comments:
[7]
Christof @ 195.172.133.226
|
28-Aug-02/3:43 AM
|
Reply
I like this - mysterious and urgent and visceral. The aftermath of what? Is it rape or her own death to whcih she says NO? I like an enigma like this.
A bit melodramatic, but also a bit intriguing. where dreams go to die is a bit much but better overall.
this is pretty much crap -5/10
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Why do you think it is crap ? Define crap. I would be interested in anything constructive you have to say.
it was... O.K.. i like your other poem, "sunshine" better..
143 view(s)
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
