Re: Songs of the hedge bird by ALChemy	amanda_dcosta 202.164.140.184	3-Jul-06/7:13 AM
All I can say Al, is that it's beautiful.
Re: August 23, 1944 - 102 miles west of Paris by Ranger	ALChemy 71.75.188.128	3-Jul-06/6:18 AM
Just watched "Saving Private Ryan" didn't you? Captured the end quite well and with few words.
Re: sayndewicches by FreeFormFixation	ALChemy 71.75.188.128	3-Jul-06/6:13 AM
Caught the moment just right. Like reading Dr Suess on a bad acid trip.
Re: a comment on Goliath by amanda_dcosta	ALChemy 71.75.188.128	3-Jul-06/6:05 AM
Giants always appear to be lazy, think about it. The Jolly Green Giant and Paul Bunyan are my only exceptions.
Re: Higher education by ecargo	ALChemy 71.75.188.128	3-Jul-06/5:58 AM
I think I like it but it's probably because I'm reading the last verse as sexual innuendo.
Re: O say, can you see? by Dovina	ALChemy 71.75.188.128	3-Jul-06/5:35 AM
The poem sounds like a battle along some border but I have no idea what border battle you're implying. Still I like the beat poet intensity of it's cadence.
Re: a comment on How to Bleed by MacFrantic	Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199	3-Jul-06/3:37 AM
I am not an accountant. I can prove this. I have a sun tan, I have a finely tailored suit - not of the machine washable variety - my shirts do not have pockets and my cuffs are double at the wrist rather than cut off at the elbow. I do not find auditing whether a company has as many paperclips as it states in its accounts even remotely horny. I have never paid for sex, usually because I am too pissed by that stage to do anything but wet myself. The only 360 degree appraisal I have ever conducted has been in a mirror whilst rubbing my colossal manhood. I do, however, find the new regulations surrounding corporate governance and the role of accountants and their consulting services so exciting that I arc ropes of cum over my belly a bit like spiderman throwing a cobweb.
Re: a comment on COCK by Stephen Robins	Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199	3-Jul-06/3:21 AM
Thanks.
Re: O say, can you see? by Dovina	Ranger 81.152.177.79	3-Jul-06/12:44 AM
Love it. Super use of the language. I wish I could say something more interesting, but I'm exhausted. And it's only 8.30am.
Re: Higher education by ecargo	Ranger 81.152.177.79	3-Jul-06/12:41 AM
Fire Technology? Where the hell are you being taught? That sounds awesome - pyromania for the educated masses. Also, the last stanza made me burst out laughing. Shameful sentiments.
Re: Higher education by ecargo	Dovina 12.72.36.229	2-Jul-06/7:13 PM
The understated last verse leaves us wondering, imagining, as a poem usually should. The "I suppose" line could be read as the end of Verse 2 or as the start of Verse 3, or both - a nice touch.
Re: Poor Old Joe by Jigg	Dovina 12.72.36.229	2-Jul-06/6:00 PM
Brief and poignant. Not bad.
Re: Goliath by amanda_dcosta	Dovina 198.22.123.103	2-Jul-06/2:53 PM
The beginning promises some fierce, ugly obstacle to which a well-aimed stone is fatal. But to compare the blithe thing, laziness, to Goliath--well, I think a giant slug would fit better. Still, the very unexpected turn has appeal. And being unbelievable is a trait of non-fiction.
Re: Goliath by amanda_dcosta	ecargo 63.22.18.184	2-Jul-06/12:46 PM
I like the beginning a lot--"gnashing your teeth and spitting out curses." Good stuff. I like the metaphor aspects the best--you lose me a bit when you make it so explicit what "goliath" is (you don't give us a chance to figure it out ourselves).
Re: canada day by Bill Z Bub	ecargo 63.22.18.184	2-Jul-06/12:35 PM
You're alive! Hiya Mr. Bub. Good to see you.
Re: a comment on Patio 95 by ecargo	ecargo 63.22.18.184	2-Jul-06/12:29 PM
Ah, poor Ranger. ;) I hope you emerge, unbowed, from the pit of athletic despair. Or at least get a poem out of it. Hiyas, folks.
Re: Doctoring Stigmata by thepinkbunnyofdoom	ecargo 63.22.18.184	2-Jul-06/12:21 PM
I really like this, bunny--it's got heart and honesty. Moves along well too--I like the gunslinger image, it fits the hankering after adventure and romance; you could have taken it even further, I think (maybe that's another poem).
Re: Lovers east of the Coombe by Caducus	ecargo 63.22.18.184	2-Jul-06/12:17 PM
The melancholy of this overcomes the limerick rhythm--it shouldn't work, but it does. Last stanza's my favorite.
Re: moving on by Jigg	ecargo 63.22.18.184	2-Jul-06/12:14 PM
I think you contort the words to fit the rhymes a little too much, particularly the last line.
Re: Memories of modernism by madamefrufru	ecargo 63.22.18.184	2-Jul-06/12:11 PM
Nice mix of remembered detail and the uncertainty wrought by time/distance. I don't think "grandeous" is a word. Maybe you were just sticky. ;)